Pledge Again

The dream: to get a whole bunch of butts down in my basement all at the same time and let 'em just whack away at each other. Or something like that. Well, probably not going to happen. Don't do bad getting guys down there one at a time to play around at drawing cards and exchanging swats and getting naked and stuff like that. Mostly because I prod and nag until they each give in. But getting 'em all together is next to impossible.

So the plan was for Thursday night. Now Tiger is my most reliable. Always build a plan around Tiger. Besides he has a butt that say please beat me. And I'm eager to please. So it was a good night for him, so then I try to round up the usual suspects. All those rats who have ventured into my trap or have suggested they might be interested. Probably a list of a dozen or more. This was for Thursday, and by Wednesday no one had responded except for Tiger who suggested the day to begin with. So I nudge a little and ask each, going to see your butt Thursday. Well, then you get a few replies. Everybody's busy. Right. Now, Pledge really named David, that big football player, pledgemaster, he doesn't say no, he says who's gonna be there. Like am I going to have enough pretty butts to keep him entertained. By then Tiger, old Reliable, says there's a family emergency and even if I hate him he can't make it. So I let the Pledgemaster know that the only butt available as far as I know is mine. So out of sympathy, or to teach me a lesson for getting smart with him, Pledge says he'll deal with my old butt, but none of this strip poker one piece of clothing off at a time shit. Nope, we start off naked and I should count on getting wet. Sounds like Pledge had a plan.

He shows up an hour late or about. A couple how are ya's, but then it's down the basement and take off your pants. But what made the big guy's eyes light up? The big old boat paddle, I cracked on Tiger's butt last time. Four foot long and probably 8-10 inches wide at the business end. Hey, this paddle was made for Pledge. We used it over and over throughout the night. No drawing cards, just bend down it's your turn, spread 'em wider, whack, whack, whack. Usually my basement paddling sessions are a pretty orderly afair. We all know the rules. We all know who gets what when how. But last night was totally different. It was totally goofy spontaneous. Like grab a paddle, whack, grab another one, whack, grab another one, whack. Over the table, over the chair, over the lap. And oh yes, in the shower. Ever been paddled all wet? Neat experience. Except as your butt is getting hotter the rest of you is getting colder. So you dry off. Exchange some hugs. Snap wet towels at each other. Then we grab belts and both tried to beat each other at the same time. Damn belts sting. It was nuts. Then after we tried spin the paddle, that didn't work, paddles don't spin, he made me get back in the shower again. You ever been hit all wet. Neat experience. Even a second time. Then after we used up the paddles, Pledge used his big old hand which seemed to match my butt cheek just right. Probably too much on the right. Need I go on? You got the idea. Pledge is one of my favorites, big old beefy guy. Born to paddle. But takes his share too. Really weren't too hard on each other. It's for play, right?

Now hope we're able to do this again. And maybe we get some of those other jerks who are usually so busy to join us.

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