Write to Dear Crabby

Dear Crabby,

I won't get into how 2006 has been a crappy year all around, so I'll just focus on my last bit of irritation.

Two weeks ago, I dropped off a print to be framed at our local Hobby Lobby store with the explicit instructions that I needed it by the 13th. I was told that would be no problem. So, I figure, if I drive over at 10AM on the 13th, it should be ready for me to pick up and check out, right?

Well, I called around 10 JUST to make sure all had progressed as planned and that my framed print was ready for pick-up anytime. I identified myself and why I was calling and the exasperated voice on the other hand informed me that framing hadn't even started on my print as yet.

WHAT?!?!?!?!

Okay, so, keeping my composure, I VERY CLEARLY made her understand that I was picking up the completed project after work and would be there at 4:30 and expected it to be done, to which she agreed.

Fast forward: 4:30 - I'm at the counter with my slip, hand it to the male clerk who goes in the back room (for a lot longer than it takes to grab a picture) and he comes back empty-handed. He informs me that my framing isn't done and wasn't aware that I had called or that I had wanted to pick it up at this time. He then asks if I wanted to wait another 1/2 hour or so while he works on it.

ArggghhhhhhhH!!

I tell him "NO" - I have another appointment and can't wait and, making this long story short, insist that when he's finished with my framing he can drive it over to my house. He apologizes profusely and, reluctantly, delivers my framed print just as instructed, and all ends well.

BUT, not without this being another incident of pure aggravation for me.

Do you think I should just bite the bullet and leave well enough alone, or should I follow-up on this with a nasty letter to Hobby Lobby voicing my DEEP dissatisfaction and recommendation of firing the incompetents who work in the framing department?

- Picture perfect, but mad as hell

Dear Picture perfect,

I think a good, healthy bitch is always good for the soul, my dear. However, it might be wise to remember the old saying in this instance--be careful what you wish for...

Unfortunately, incompetents don't just ‘go away' when they're fired--they recycle themselves. More likely than not, if they disappear from the hobby store, you'll see them next month, screwing up your burger order or bagging your toilet cleaner with your leaf lettuce.

And, while ranting might feel good, it will behoove you to remember that a good complaint always needs to be accompanied by a demand for free goods and/or services. So what if you don't have another print to be framed? Make a damn poster that says “Hobby Lobby Sucks!” and take it in for the free framing. The expression on their faces, alone, will put a smile in your bitchin' heart.

-Crabby

Dear Crabby,

Today, along with the properly addressed mail in my mailbox, I found an open blank envelope with a Christmas card inside, signed "Jason, your mailman."

Maybe I'm wrong, but I think that's about as shameless a 'hint' for a tip that I've seen. I have never talked to the guy, didn't know his name was Jason, or anything. However, he has to know we are the Johnsons, since all our mail that he delivers says so. Too bad he couldn't have bothered himself to personalize even just the card with "Dear Johnson Family."

Maybe he figures that me knowing his name would come in handy, just in case I decide to replace the card with some cash and put his name on the outside of the not-accidentally-blank envelope and return it to the mailbox.

I don't mind tipping when it's appropriate, but what do you make of this, Crabby? Should I give this guy money?

- Feeling a Little Postal

Dear Feeling a Little Postal,

In my world, a ‘tip' is something you give to a person who not only provides you a service, but also whose wages rely on a regular supplement from their customers.

What your mailman is doing is lobbying for Christmas gifts from strangers. If this is something you like to do, then send a check my way instead. Otherwise keep your cash.

Unless, of course, he's hot and you want him to ‘deliver' more than just the mail. Then you can go ahead and slip him a little something in his envelope.

-Crabby

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