As 2003 began, my feelings that I MUST be able to find a way to make a living at doing spoken words were getting more and more intense, while my frustrations were getting worse and worse because I still haven't been able to figure it out. I was getting more and more sick and tired of working at jobs where I get treated like shit. I was working 2 part time jobs in January 2003 and both of them sucked. In January 2003, I was still recovering from being written up on December 14, 2002 at a store I work at because a customer who was a fucking cunt complained about me. I was ringing her up and then she gave me some coupons and apparently for some reason, the coupons didn't take off enough and I was startled and I couldn't figure out what was going on. The fucking bitch tells the manager that that if she doesn't take action against me, then she's going to go over her head and report me to the district office, all because she said that I gave her a strange look because I didn't know why the coupons didn't work right..
Meanwhile, throughout 2003, things turned out to be even MUCH worse at an inventory job I was at and things got off to a very bad start on the very 1st job that I had in 2003 on January 5 because 1 of the supervisors I had to deal with (Cathy) was a total fucking cunt Cathy (the fucking cunt) sent me home that day because I made too many mistakes and that was the 1st job in which the fucking cunt sent me home since February 27, 2002, she wanted me to call the district manager the following day to ask him if I still have a job. That is an indicator that the fucking cunt had it in for me. I will say more about Cathy, the fucking cunt, later.
Meanwhile, my 1st spoken words performance at Balls in 2003, which was about my desire to want to see a full scale nuclear war and see the world come to an end because of my disgust with so many different things, which included having to work for pricks and cunts, but my main focus of that piece was with the pending war with Iraq, I was hoping that it would lead to a full scale nuclear war, so all the bullshit in this world would come to an end for good and humans will no longer make the same mistakes over and over again like they have done for thousands of years. I certainly used dark humor with it because I didn't want to be serious because being serious is jut too dam fucking depressing. There were people who enjoyed what I had to say and I got some laughs from what I said. It surprised me that when people laughed the most when I mentioned that the only thing that this country is good for is all-you-can-eat buffets and I like to eat so much until I throw up.
In February 2003, I decided to be a little more uplifting and use more humor when I read my dream speech at Balls on February 23, 2003. Now, the 1st person to give a dream speech was Martin Luther King and the 2nd person to give it was Jello Biafra. Again, I talked about my vision on how the world would be a better place by using a lot of dry humor, which is something that Martin Luther King didn't do in his speech and Jello Biafra used humor, but I decided to go way beyond what he did in his speech. Also in February 2003, there was another erotic poetry slam at Kieran's on Valentine's Day and I decided to read my piece about the Catholic Priest and the judges were pricks and cunts and I got the worst score than anyone. With poetry slams, people are scored on a scale of 0-10 with 0 being the most horrible poem in the world, with 10 being the most outstanding excellent poem in the world. Someone gave me a score of .666. I don't know why my score was so low? My story certainly wasn't boring and a lot of people laughed while I was reading it! There were a few people who told me that they really loved it too, but there are way too many fucking assholes who can't handle something as extreme as that story about the Catholic Priest.
Finally after so many delays, on March 23, 2003, I did my 1st repeat at Balls when I talked about how to get Jesus to love you and it didn't seem to go over as good as it did the 1st time that I read it. On April 20, 2003, I read my piece at Balls for the 1st time on how to find the right bathroom to take a healthy shit and I got a lot of laughs and a lot of people found that to be very funny! I read that for the 1st time in August 2002 when the national poetry slam was held in Minneapolis at the 21 hour open mike they had before they ended up canceling it, which really fucking sucked. What I hadn't mentioned is I was going to a spiritualist church and in some ways, those people can be cool, but in other ways, they can be real assholes. They also did short psychic readings. Sometime in February and March, Brooke gives me a reading and tells me that I should come out of my "shell" and open up with people and encouraged me to do a talk during the service, so I decided to do my talk on March 16, 2003. Brooke and this guy Tom came to Balls on March 23 to hear me do my thing about how to get Jesus to Love you and they told me that it was funny, but told me that I didn't sound convincing when I mentioned that I was from the Minnesota Baptist Association! I didn't write anything out other than an outline when I did my talk at that church on March 16 and I wasn't nearly as extreme as I am with my spoken words performances, but I did talk about things that suck, like Florida. A lot of people laughed while I was doing my thing and I was going to do another talk on Easter Sunday 2003. Well this guy John who was there tells me that me and him are going to do a "co-talk" and tells me that me and him need to get together and talk about it, so I get together with him on April 15, 2003 (tax day) and he lays a guilt trip on me over what I talked about. He tells me that seeing that a lot of people enjoyed what I had to say and I got no official complaints, the shocking things that I talked about caused the women who were there eyeballs to roll with some of the things that I talked about and seeing that it is Easter, it is unlikely that someone new would show up and they would be horrified after hearing me speak and would get the "wrong" impression of what their church is like and not come back. I didn't know what the fuck I could talk about that would be too "upsetting" for someone. When Easter arrived I did the best that I could, but Brooke decided to cancel out me and John's talk and do a traditional Easter service. I decided to reschedule my talk to May 25, the Sunday before Memorial Day and only 2 people showed up, so I didn't feel like doing a talk. After that, I decided to go back into "my shell", at least with them because I didn't want to deal with hearing anymore shit about being too explicit or "upsetting" someone.
On May 25, I did my 2nd repeat at Balls when I talked about being Laura Ingalls in my previous lifetime and that didn't go over as good as it did the 1st time that I read it, but there were people who liked it. I planned to do a spoken words performance at Balls on June 15, 2003, but Leslie fucked up and my name wasn't on the list. The thing is I didn't feel like performing that night either because it was going to be the most controversial thing that I ever talked about and my entire focus was going to be about how much I hate breeding so much. I got rescheduled to do my rant against breeding on June 29. On June 15, Larry mentioned that he was going to bring his cat to the theater on June 29. I was thinking, I want to bring my cat too and I would postpone my anti-breeding rant until July and redo my piece on paying tribute to my cat who died. Well, Leslie told me that the reason why Larry was able to take his cat is because there used to be mouses in the theater and the cat would catch the mouses and eat them and the mouses are gone, so no new other people were allowed to bring there cat into the theater. Seeing that I couldn't bring my cat, I went ahead with my anti-breeding rant because I hate breeding! I don't think that too many people liked it, but it is important that someone talks about how much breeding sucks!
On July 13, 2003, I did another repeat spoken words performance called Evil Weather, which is a rant about how much I hate hot weather and summer. When I 1st read that piece in September 2001, I thought that Leslie was upset about how nasty I was with all the swearing I did describing hot weather, but when I was done this time, she mentioned that what I talked about is 1 of the few things that I talked about that she agrees with. Meanwhile, another woman tells me that she didn't really like what I said during my anti-breeding rant on June 29 and she was going to counter it by talking about how "wonderful" babies are and how great overpopulating the planet really is. Listening to what she said made me feel like throwing up especially when she said that babies are like Rainbows. No they're not! Rainbows are nice to look at, they don't make obnoxious screeching sounds and they don't smell as bad as babies because babies smell worse than shit. The only thing she said that was cool is she mentioned something about rainbows being connected to her cunt and she actually used that word, but it was pro-breeding propaganda about how "great" things are going to be as soon as a brat pops out her twat. A lot of women say that, but then realize how much breeding fucking sucks once it's too late. She also mentioned that I have a lot of anger and issues to work out and dropped a hint that I need therapy. I plan to have a rant about how therapy is a bunch of total fucking bullshit in a future spoken words performance. She also said that instead of talking about things that piss me off, I should be more positive and talk about things I like and make me happy. Even Leslie got in and said after I mentioned how I like fall so much better than summer that I should talk about nice things about fall and be more positive about things.
Well, anything about me being more "positive" went further down the toilet on July 22, 2003 when I found out that I lost my inventory job that I had been working at since February 2000 because of that fucking cunt, Cathy who I was working for. At around 3:20 on that day about an hour before I was about to leave for a job that day, the fucking cunt calls me and leaves a message on my answering machine and tells me that I ain't needed for that job that day and tells me that she needs for me to call her because she needs to talk to me ASAP. I was home at the time that the fucking cunt left that message, but I don't pick up the phone until I know who's calling because I have heard from too many people who I don't want to hear from and Cathy was certainly 1 of them. I knew that when the fucking cunt told me that she needed to talk to me, it was not good and sure enough it wasn't. The fucking cunt decided to fire me for not working fast enough and not making the fucking quota at a lot of jobs.
When I started working there in February 2000, it was difficult and stressful having to learn a new job and I made the decision in early 2000 after I got fucked over and fired from that other job in January 2000, that it wouldn't be such an extreme strain on my nerves if I worked 2 part time jobs, instead of a full time job and another part time job. As I said before, I believe that greatly contributed to causing me to lose all those jobs because having such an extreme lack of free time strained my nerves so bad and it contributed to me not doing as well on my work, both with accuracy and speed. I think that I made the right decision, even though I was making quite a bit less money, the job was steady and I was able to at least hold that job down for over 3 years.
I had 1 supervisor, Mike, who was mostly cool, except he had some right wing views with some issues, which I didn't care for, but he was supportive and he treated me well most of the time. After my experience with supervisors, they can all be assholes at times, but Mike treated me well most of the time and he even told me that I did a good job. Cathy came along in October 2000 and as soon as I met her, the 1st impression that she gave me is she was a fucking cunt. I am sure that you have heard the saying that 1st impressions are everlasting. I have noticed that if someone gives me an impression that they are an asshole, they usually turn out to be an asshole, but if 1st impressions are everlasting, then why is it when someone gives me the impression that they are cool, they still end up turning out to be assholes so many times? I have also noticed when a supervisor comes along that happens to be a prick or a cunt, it usually takes over a year before they start trying to get rid of me. That was the case with Cathy who ended up sending me home from a job on February 27, 2002 because I made too many mistakes, but she also sent me home because she had it in for me. I didn't have any major problems with Katie until February 27, 2002, but she had this very cold and hostile personality and she seemed to favor some people while being an evil cold viscous cunt towards me.
I was actually content working this job at the beginning, which certainly wasn't the way it was at most of the jobs that I have ever been at. Meanwhile, things started to go down the terlet at my job at this inventory job in January 2001 when they decided to set a quota on how many pieces people should be counting each hour and it's this fucking quota fucking bullshit that really started to cause me to start hating this job. The quota was almost always more than I could do. In January 2001, it wasn't Cathy, but Jean who was the 1 who was giving me shit for not being able to work fast enough. As time went on, Cathy turned out to be a lot more horrible than Jean and Jean was no longer working for that company.
In May 2002, I was so relieved when I found out that Katie was transferred to another district and I was so relieved, but in November 2002 they decided to transfer that fucking cunt back to the district that I was working in, which ended up leading to the demise of my job. Having to put up with her fucking shit made my life miserable, which got started on January 5 of this year when I came into a job and Katie was in an extremely bitchy mood and she was very mean to me. Her extremely bitchy mood made me feel uncomfortable, which caused me to make a lot of mistakes, which caused me to get sent home again. This time she told me that I need to call the district manager to ask him if I still have a job. I didn't bother calling him. 3 weeks later with making too many mistakes fresh on my mind, I was misfortunate enough to have to deal with Katie again and put up with her fucking bullshit. I was counting bras and panties at a place that was extremely picky with accuracy and I hated those fucking things. Because I was so concerned about accuracy, my speed dropped down big time, so Katie then starts giving me shit about my speed. In April, I was at a job when Katie mentions that people should be able to count 700 pieces an hour, but then says "don't jeopardize accuracy for speed, but then she comes to me and says, "you better make 700 pieces an hour, I mean it". Basically, the fucking bitch talks out of both sides of her mouth. On May 15, I am at the end of a job, getting ready to go home when Katie approaches me and tells me that she needs to talk to me in her very rude tone of voice. That is almost never good. She shows me a list of jobs I was at and I failed to make the fucking quota on most of them and if I didn't make the fucking quota by the 5th job, I would be terminated. My luck ran out on July 22, 2003. My experience with Cathy inspired me to do a major rant against her at many spoken words performances. It didn't take me long to write my rant against Cathy. I had a feeling that this fucking bullshit would happen since January when the fucking cunt was harassing me so bad, so it gave me plenty of time to think of good ways to dis her.
Also, an open mike called Lingo, got started at a club in Minneapolis called First Avenue, which has a lot of concerts from alternative bands and they play some real cool music at times, while it other times it is boring and kind of sucks. It was on July 16, I did my 1st spoken word performance at First Avenue, which I already performed at Balls in April about finding the right bathroom to take a shit in. I was too devastated from what that fucking cunt did to me on July 22 that I couldn't get my self to get out and do any spoken words performance. I was able to bounce back with a vengeance on July 30 after writing and reading my rant against Cathy the Cunt and the way she treated me. I then read that same piece at Balls August 24, 2003. So much for talking about "positive" things!
I keep saying this again and again, but don't seem to be getting anywhere, but the experience with cunts like Cathy and all the other assholes that I had to stomach working for over years have taught me that it ain't just a dream to be able to make a living at doing spoken words, I MUST be able to make a living at doing spoken words, but I haven't been able to go very far with it, which really fucking sucks, even though my writing and performances are very good and unique. That is also the reason why I have run into so many problems with people being fucking assholes. I am so grateful that there have been so many people who enjoy hearing poetry who have supported me and told me that they like what I do and the way I do it. The problem is I ran into assholes who don't like what I do and my style of spoken words don't completely fit in with the way so many other people do poetry.
Some people told me that instead of going to poetry readings, I should go to open mikes at comedy clubs, so I have given it a try and I have had worse luck with my stuff going over good at comedy clubs than the way it went over at poetry readings. I tried that comedy club in December and the fuckers wouldn't even let me go on when I came back for the 2nd time. I tried a another comedy club and some of the people liked my stuff, but most people really didn't. When I came back to that comedy club, some fucking asshole told me that with the way my style of comedy is, I will never make it in that business. He also said that I will never make it because I would read my stuff off a script and the fucking asshole told me that comedians don't read stuff off a script when they go up on stage. At poetry readings, there are a some people who read stuff off a script when they go up on stage. That guy also told me that I will never make it by doing comedy because I was the only person who went up on stage reading off a script. I really don't like it when someone points out that I am the only person who does something a certain way. That kind of shit has happened to me many times and I really fucking HATE that! That guy also told me that he's been in the comedy business for over 20 years and he mentioned that he was only trying to help me. That guy also told me that he's been on Comedy Central many times doing shows. If he's been on Comedy Central, then why was he at an open mike for amateurs?
Unfuckingfortuneately, I have to concede to say that when someone criticizes me, I need to step back and see how I could do things better, although I will never totally give into all of the things they want me to do. How do I do something at a comedy open mike and not read something off a script? By memorizing my stuff. OK, I got my thing memorized, went up to read it and forgot half of what I was going to fucking say. A part of the problem is I know that a lot of people are fucking assholes and ain't going to like what I have to say, so I get stressed out and nervous. That guy also criticized me for not looking at the audience while being on stage. That was because I was looking at what I was reading. That guy also suggested that it would be OK to write down some words to help me remember what I would talk about. What I have tried to do is look more at the audience, bring what I have written out and try not to look at it and that is what has worked out best at comedy open mikes. The bigger problem is 1 of the guys who hosts 1 of the open mikes and told me that I am not a comic. I am a writer and most people who do stand up do 1 liners. That guy was open minded enough to say that I don't fit in with most comedians, but I could very well be onto something new. My style of comedy is a lot more like storytelling. That is what Andy Kaufman did as well as Bill Cosby. I hate being compared to Bill Cosby because his style of comedy and storytelling sucks. Also, some of the stuff that George Carlin does is storytelling and he is very successful. What is ironic is the stuff that I hear people talk about at comedy open mikes is more interesting than what I hear at poetry readings because a lot of comedians talk so vulgar and some are not at all PC with the stuff they talk about.
Another reason why I have had such a difficult time at getting anywhere is I don't have enough friends who will support me with what I do. I really need someone who will give me coaching to help motivate me to go out there and get things done and make my dreams a reality. The problem with finding coaching is it costs money. Lots of fucking money. Tony Robbins has a phone # to call to get coaching, but it costs $195 just for a 1/2 hour and he claims that it will trigger something off that will permanently change something in the thought process that will motivate someone to go out and get things accomplished. I don't have enough faith that spending $195 for so little time is going to create such wonderful dramatic changes in my life. Another problem is a lot of coaches are pushy assholes. What I need is someone who will help get me motivated who doesn't turn out to be a prick. I am grateful for those who are cool enough to support me at open mikes, but I went to some organizations where I would surely think that people would be cool and be supportive of me, but they turned out to be pricks and cunts. With how things have turned out to be such shit this year with losing my job and not getting anywhere with open mikes, I do at least have some good news. I was able to get my 1st gig at doing a paid spoken words performance coming up in December 2003 at Patrick's Cabaret. The other bit of good news is despite how I scored such a bad score reading my thing about the Catholic Priest at the poetry slam on Valentine's Day, I realized that the purpose of my life isn't a popularity contest or being pretty and telling a bunch of narrow minded mediocre assholes what they wanted to hear. That's why after scoring so low on Valentine's Day, I said "fuck poetry slams." It's all a bunch of bullshit based on popularity being scored by narrow minded judges", but wait. I changed my mind. There are people who like what I have to say. It also exposes my style of spoken words to a larger # of people. I decided to go to another open mike on June 10, 2003 and it was a poetry slam using props. It was a lot more tame than the Catholic Priest story and I talked about how I like Halloween more than any other day of the year and seeing I was able to use props, I decided to bring my ghost with me that lights up and shakes. I scored high enough to make it on to the 2nd round, but I didn't have anything prepared, so I just wrote something out at the sperm of the moment, but it wasn't good enough for me to make it to the 3rd round. I got nastier at the next poetry slam that I went to on August 12 when I decided to do my rant against Cathy the cunt. I was only allowed 3 minutes, so I wasn't able to say as much as I wanted to. Despite referring to Cathy as a fucking cunt, most judges gave me a high score. Unfuckingfortuneately, 1 judge gave me a low score, probably because she was a prissy cunt who was offended because of all the swearing that I did. Unfuckingfortuneatley, that 1 low score was enough to keep me from moving on to the 2nd round.
In September 2003, I decided to do another rerun at Balls and read my piece about my experience at keeping records of the weather. I also decided to talk about that asshole judge Roy Moore in Alabama who wants to force Christianity down everyone's throat by displaying the 10 commandments in the court house. Again, some of the judges were assholes and I didn't make it to the 2nd round, even though a lot of people enjoyed what I had to say. The person who hosted the poetry slam said that I am improving. I certainly ain't staying away from the controversial and nasty issues! I think that I may be improving at the way I am writing things and doing the performance itself and the only way to improve the performance is to keep doing it.
Another form of puke sucking vomit that is going on in my life is I ended up getting kidney stones back in May 2002. I had to go to the emergency room twice for this fucking bullshit. I had to go back in August 2002 I ended up getting a hospital bill totaling over $3000 from both visits. The insurance paid a good chunk of my May 2002 emergency room visit, but they are being fucking assholes and they won't pay for the August 2002 visit. I still have close to $2000 left in bills to pay and I never set $2000 aside to pay a hospital bill, so the hospital turned the matter over to a collection agency to harass me and in September 2003 they turned the matter over to a couple of lawyers, which really fucking pisses me off. I decided to talk about how there should be universal health insurance in this country at the poetry slam on October 14. The lowest score I got was a 6 with 8.9 being the highest, but unfuckingfortuneately, it wasn't enough for me to make it to the 2nd round. Another thing that really annoys me is commercials, so I decided to do a satire on some commercials at Balls on October 19, 2003 and it was the 1st time I dressed up in drag on stage when I pretended to be a woman doing a public service announcement as to why abortion is a wonderful choice! There were a few people who liked it, so I will do it again.
I at least have some good news. When I performed my thing about beating off in front of a cat at a comedy club in Maplewood, Minnesota, it went over quite well with a lot of people. It is the best luck I had at a comedy club. I have been able to change the way I perform it to more of a stand up type format and that was able to help. I also had a little extra time and that was able to help quite a bit by not having to rush through. I read that same piece at comedy clubs before and it didn't go over that good. I tried to go back to the comedy open mike at that Mexican restaurant on October 19 to do that piece, but things fucked up and I couldn't go on stage. On October 22, 2003, I left for my long drive to Atlanta at 11PM to drive all night. I only got 3 hours into my journey before my eyes started to fuck up and I don't know if it was that Pinkeye shit that I keep getting or what. It was so bad by the time I got into Wisconsin, I had to pull over to the side of the road to sleep for about an hour and I put some antibiotic stuff in my eyes. After I continued driving, my eyes still felt like fucking shit and hurt like Hell, but it got better once the sun rose. I got to St. Louis at around 3:30 that afternoon in which I stopped for the night because I was too fucking tired to keep going. I went out to a gay bar in St. Louis that night and found someone to talk to but he turned out to be a fucking asshole. He seemed nice at the beginning, but I told him that I like industrial Goth music and he told me that I shouldn't listen to that anymore because it was "so passé" and it just ain't popular anymore and he told me that I should listen to Madonna. 1st of all, I have a mind of my own and I don't need some fucking asshole dictating to me what kind of music I should listen to. 2nd of all, I got turned off from Madonna. After she popped a brat out her twat and now she was so interested in this "child" and "family" fucking bullshit. I told that guy that I got turned off from Madonna. Because she was too pro-breeding and that guy asked me, "what's wrong with breeding?" Gee, fucking plenty! He then tells me that he's against abortion, which of course is another big red flag telling me that he's a fucking asshole and he used the bible to "prove" that abortion is "wrong." The bible also says that homosexuality is wrong and he claims that there are parts of the bible that says homosexuality is OK. Just another example of some fucking asshole twisting the bible to justify what he does, while fucking with taking away reproductive freedom to satisfy his narrow minded fucking viewpoint. Anyway, I left St. Louis at noon on October 24 and I didn't arrive in Atlanta until 4AM on October 25. Meanwhile, someone told me that people would attack me if I attack Christianity and talk about how wonderful abortion is in Atlanta, Because Atlanta is in the south. Even though Atlanta is in the south, it is a fairly progressive city. If I can't talk about abortion in Atlanta, then I wouldn't want to live there. I went to a couple of open mikes in Atlanta while I was there but I did chicken out and not talk about abortion. On October 29, I went to a place that had an open mike mainly for musicians (and most of them sucked) but I decided to read my piece about why it was so unpleasant traveling with my parents and no one there liked it and I heard a lot of people making grunts when talking about my parents taking a shit and stinking up the motel room, however Joon was there and she laughed hysterically while I was reading my thing. The next day, I went to another open mike that was in a suburb of Atlanta and I decided to read the tribute to my cat that died in November 2002. That open mike only had a few people signed up and it was again nothing but musicians. Things went over better at this open mike than the 1 I went to the day before Because there were at least a couple people there who had a sense of humor to find that what I talked about to be funny. All in all, there are a couple of places in Minneapolis in which there are some people who are cool enough to really enjoy what I talk about and I am was still reluctant to move to Atlanta out of fear that I won't find a good place to read my stuff at open mikes and there are quite a few other things that I am afraid of as well. The weather was also too fucking hot a lot of the time that I was in Atlanta, but there were a couple of nice days. It was too fucking hot when I left on November 3 and it was too fucking hot all the way until Indianapolis, Indiana. It was even a bit too fucking hot in Chicago for early fucking November, but a cold front arrived with some nasty thunderstorms as I was arriving in the Chicago area on November 4 and it was very cool there on November 5 with a high of only 42°. It was very cold once I arrived in Minneapolis in the early morning on November 5 when the temperature was only 14°.
I always notice that coming back from a vacation fucking sucks, especially when I would have to face looking for a job and hope not to end up working somewhere in which I would have to put up with someone as bad as Cathy the cunt. I went to a poetry slam 5 days After getting home from Atlanta on November 11, 2003 in which I read a piece about how I feel about Ronald Reagan, which is about what a fucking asshole he was and how it is unfair that serial killers like Jeffrey Dahmer had to go to prison, while serial killers like Ronald Reagan get treated like they are fucking heroes Because they are so fucking stupid and believe all the bullshit and lies they are told in the media. Unfuckingfortunately, I didn't make it to the 2nd round. I also read a couple of pieces I did at poetry slams at Balls for the 1st time on November 23. I read the thing about that asshole judge Roy Moore in Alabama and I read the 1 about beating off in front of the cat, which I read on Valentine's Day in 2002. At the end, a girl told me that I am brave to read stuff like that. Actually it's fucking stressful, but I get that andrenelin rush from offending assholes, while entertaining those who are cool enough to love it.
The big grand finally for 2003 was my 1st paid spoken words performance at Patrick's Cabaret on December 5 and 6. On December 5, I decided to read my classic piece on how to get Jesus to Love you. Unfuckingfortnately, I didn't get a whole lot of laughs. I then went on to conclude with talking about that asshole judge Roy Moore. Thankfully, there were a couple of people who really loved it. On December 6, I did the classic piece about how I was Laura Ingalls in my previous lifetime. Unfuckingfortunately, I didn't get a lot of laughs like I did at Balls and Kieran's. I then went on to read the piece about why I don't like it when the watches me when I beating off in front of the cat and I mentioned that Laura Ingalls and her sister Mary masturbated. Then some narrow minded uptight fucking cunt decided to heckle me and she told me that I am finished and my time was up. Sara normally hosts the cabaret, but her brother filled in that night and thankfully he defended me and mentioned the importance of protecting freedom of speech, even if it offends someone with a closed mind. He even told that fucking cunt that she was very rude for interrupting and heckling me like that. Thankfully, there were a couple of other people who were cool enough to enjoy hearing what I had to say and mentioned that the people who couldn't handle hearing me talk about the things that I talked about were stuck up.
The final poetry slam in 2003 was supposed to be on December 9, but there was a big snowstorm that day and very few people showed up, so they decided to cancel it at the last minute, due to low turnout. They did decide to have an open mike instead. I was going to read a rant I wrote about bullies, but I decided to go ahead and read it at the open mike and the good news is I didn't have to worry about making the 2nd round and I read a couple of other things I read at previous poetry slams, but I can't remember what the fuck they were at this point. The final thing I did at Balls in 2003 was on December 21 which was the rant I did against Christmas in 2002, but I modified it a bit. Unfuckingfortunately, I didn't have much luck at getting anywhere doing open mikes at comedy clubs, but there are some people who are cool enough to like the way I do my thing. I have had better luck at getting people to like what I do at poetry readings than comedy, probably Because there is a serious side to the way I do my thing with the dark humor that I use. I did do a thing at a comedy club on November 30, 2003 about my trip to Atlanta and I did get quite a few laughs, but I need to find a place where people ain't fucking assholes, which isn't an easy thing to do. That's about it for 2003, so it's time to go into Pat's 2004 Vision of the World Page and I am running out of time and patience, so hopefully, I will get somewhere.