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My Best Foreign Friend                                                                      By Lisa Lee                                                 Contents

Helen, my teacher, was my first friend who was a native New Yorker, my first “foreign” friend. She was an ordinary and decent woman. For me- an emigrant from China- her kindness, her great help and encouragement, had an extraordinary effect.

I met Helen at International Center, in Midtown, where I took a one- hour conversation class each week. The teachers are retired people who volunteer to teach foreigners to learn speak English.

Helen, a short, old woman, dressed simply and tidily, greeted me with a warm smile and told me to “Please sit down and relax.” Then she seemed to see I was nervous. “Ah, you don’t know the meaning of.”

I nodded.

“Then, do you understand, 'Take it easy' ? "

I said, “Yes.”

"Now, repeat it: 'Take it easy, relax.' ”

Easily, we continued our conversation. It was very difficult for me to hear and speak English because I was afraid of making mistakes and losing face. Helen helped release me from my shyness and tension; she patiently corrected my pronunciation; she encouraged me to speak loudly and clearly. Gradually, I could speak to a foreigner in English without fear.

Helen became my main teacher. We knew each other better and better. Helen’s husband died when she was only forty-one. She was a devoted wife and never remarried. Despite hardship, she raised her two children and gave them good educations. After she retired, she kept her life active and busy. Every day she went to the Senior Center to play cards, to join a knitting group, and even to attend a Hebrew course. She volunteered at the International Center and the Jewish Community Center. I told her that some of my old relatives complained of their lonely lives. Helen said, “If you always stay in your own shell, you will feel endless loneliness. I’m still studying so I can gain some new knowledge and keep my mind up to date. I do my best to serve my community and the people who need help. Therefore, I don’t feel lonely or bored.” She added a joke: “spend one dollar to play Lotto, to give me hope.”

Before I went to SUNY Hospital of Brooklyn for a job interview, I told Helen my hesitation and worry. She encouraged me. “Lisa, don’t worry too much. You have a High School Equivalency Diploma; you have passed the State’s test for clerk. According to these conditions, you should get a job in the hospital. You must build up your self-trust. Remember this proverb: Self-trust is the first secret of success. Lisa, be brave and dare to try!” I did as she said, and the hospital offered me a job as a Level 1 calculation clerk. I could not believe myself: A fifty-five-year-old emigrant from China could be an employee of the State Hospital. I told her this good news. She said, “Congratulations! It’s a very good beginning for you.”

Because of working at two jobs, I quit the conversation course but still kept the friendship with Helen. One day she told me that her son had brain cancer, and was in a coma. The tumor was so deep the doctor could not do surgery. I hugged her tiny body and tried to comfort her, but I knew her heart was bleeding.

A month later, I went to visit Helen and the doorman told me that she was staying with her daughter in another state since her son died. About a year later, Helen called and my husband and I went to her apartment at once. I was glad that she looked much better. Helen was still concerned about how I was doing. Hearing I was working hard and well, she smiled, “Well done. I think you now recognize the truth: Success grows out of struggle to overcome difficulties.” She handed me a pair of red knitted slippers. “It’s a gift for my best friend.”

I was so touched, not only by her gift, but also by her teaching, her trust, and her great love. I did not know that was the last time I would see her.

After a few weeks my husband and I went to visit Helen again. The doorman said, “Sorry! Miss Helen passed away two weeks ago. She had a heart attack.” We were so shocked and miserable. We lost our respected elder.

I remember somebody had told me that New York is a prosperous but cruel city, most people are snobbish, selfish, and lack human sympathy. In fact, some people are snobbish and selfish, even have hearts of stone, but I do believe most New Yorkers are as nice as Helen. They are ordinary, not famous or wealthy, but they have love, affection, and a noble spirit, like my best friend, my respected teacher Helen.

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