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| ... MINE CALENDAR ... |
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| ... HMMM ... |
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What the bugger does our Government do all day, seeing as there are no results to be seen? |
| ... WHAT'S NEW ... |
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| ... UNRESOLVED ISSUES ... |
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 Karissa Maitha, MP & Minister for Local Government: No stone was to be left unturned in the quest to discover who burnt down City Hall. We still await with bated breath Najib Balala, MP & Minister, Sports, Gender & Cultural Affairs: Encouraging Kenyans to lynch one another Goldenberg: I think I'm the only one in Kenya who did not receive money from this thing! Robert Ouko: Shot himself, torched himself and drove himself to Got Alila in that order John Serut, MP: Pouncer on female interns Sospeter Ojaamong MP: Wife's face keeps accidentally hitting his fist. Reuben Ndolo, MP: Encouraging Kenyans to torch others. Musa Sirma, MP: Encouraging Kenyans to slash one another Mwangi Kiunjuri, MP & Assistant Minister, Energy: Playing games of bedminton on Koinange Street Chirau Mwakwere, MP & Minister, Labour: See above |
| ... IRREGULARS ... |
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| ... FINALLY ... |
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| ... SYNDICATION ... |
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I humbly profess: The finest produce
of Mother Kenya |
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Just the other day I was strolling down the lane that leads to Mi Casa and before me was a lady of about 50 or so carrying a large package of what appeared to be assorted groceries. She looked like she was having a rough time of it so I cleared my throat and asked if she'd mind a hand. |
She was just opening her mouth to reply when I got the opportunity to understand what a 'voice like ice' is. One such informed me from behind that "My mother is not helpless". I turned to see where this was coming from and found myself eye to eye with the daughter of her mother. Looked to be middle to late twenties and dressed in the standard Kenyan uniform of tight fitting pre-faded jeans that look painted on and a halter top that was having trouble containing its considerable contents. There are figures that are designed for such dressing and trust me my friends, hers was such. At this point in time the double barreled stance of both hands and hips, which is never a sign for good things to come for us gents, was directed at me. She testified again that her parent was not helpless. I informed her that I did not think she was for one second, but just wanted to give her a hand. The peacekeeping smile I normally employ to deliver me from sticky situations was deployed and it failed. My help, I was curtly informed, was neither wanted nor needed. Her mother was as equally as capable as I and was not, she repeated, helpless. When faced with such er ... nonsense most people tend to get annoyed but this is where I am not like most people. Mother looked on in amusement and daughter looked in shocked amazement as I did something that in hindsight I should have contained. I burst into laughter. At this point in time, God's excellent sense of humour manifested itself and with a ripping sound the bag burst and the road was littered with assorted groceries. Perhaps I was still smiling when I asked her if it was okay to help retrieve the groceries from the road. I suspect i've made an enemy for life but I'm not losing any sleep over it. What is it with the militant women's lib? Must every little thing be taken as an insult to femininity? Please, explain it to me. I promise not to laugh. As for that lass no offence my dear but you are laughable! |
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Now then, there's this cat who fondly imagines 50Cent is a cheap copy of him who goes by the name of CMB Prezzo. The CMB apparently stands for Cash Money Brothers (No relation to Cash Money Millionaires) This cat arrived at some obscure awards show or the other at the Carnivore in a helicopter. This was probably designed to impress the thousands of gullible juveniles -- sorry, the fans, but sense ought to have prevailed when one realizes that the only distance between Wilson Airport and the Carnivore is a couple of FEET |
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This gentleman is living proof of either the conceited nature or the skewed vision of fishermen worldwide. Here we see him desperately try to convince wananchi that the fish he caught was actually this big. |
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The age old question of who's dad can beat up who's dad raised its ugly head during the last session of the Bomas Constitutional review conference. Here we see some delegates hard at it. |
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After spending the better part of the day with legislators Gor Sunguh and Oburu Odinga it suddenly dawns on the chap in the middle that he has lost his tour group. |
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Vice President and Home Affairs Minister Moody Awori and his entourage react with amazement when they notice the prisoners are not using the Internet to do research as they promised. Here the hapless fellows try to explain that the web sites opened themselves without any action on their side. |
... THIS PART TO DRIVE THE CIA NUTS ... |
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Bush. CIA. Osama. Bomb. Al Qaeda. Saddam Hussein. Chemical Ali. Bowling Ali. Dimly Lit Ali. Dead End Ali. |
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| H. E. Mwai Confucius Kibaki, President of Kenya. It has recently been discovered that he is already a ceremonial president |
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Some more fine produce of the MotherLand |
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| Past gems of my priceless wit |
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| Entries from a rather unorthodox journal, updated at whim |
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| These people need to be pistol whipped and flushed down the toilet at first opportunity! |
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| Take a look at some assorted links. I will collect more and organize them when I feel inclined to but until then -- enjoy! |
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| Some stuff really ticks me off. I mean REALLY ticks me off ... |
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