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Read Issue 68: Michuki, George and arms and some more headlines!
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5 March: Total Motor Show
7 March: FA Cup Quarter Finals
21 March: Joy - you're an old bag!
1 April: THIS IS YOUR DAY!

The Kenyan Pundit
Jozie's
Mental Acrobatics

A heartfelt LETTER FROM GOMORRAH
A BEAUTY PAEGENT like no other!
THIS IS A DREAM!
SOCCER MANIA - clash of the titans
DO TELL ... Questions that beggar an answer!
Keep up to date. Visit the INFORMATION DESK
EULOGIES should be more along these line s ...
THE GIRLS PLAY BALL
INTELLIGENCE is not as common as you think!
Fun and games at a UNIVERSITY RIOT!
There are SOME DAYS ...
A KUMI KUMI Guide for the novices. A MUST read!
A POEM for someone special!
DEAREST JOHN: John Doe's better half replies with energy to issues raised by her worse half!
DEAREST JANE: A man addresses issues such as crossing rivers for his be loved ...
FAVOURITE MOVIES Some notable personalities share their favourite flicks
PRESS RELEASE FROM THE AFGHANISTANI BROADCASTING CORPORATION The proprietor of Afghanistan's first TV studio shares his visions
DEDICATIONS: Music is the language of the heart -- touching messages to loved and not so loved ones

Events over the last couple of weeks have compelled me to push back the frank and candid look at our lovably inept cabinet and administration and concentrate on more pressing matters!

Make no mistake about it - NARC is proving speedily to be just as inept as KANU ever was! Talk about old wine in new skins!

Security Minster Chris Murungaru, fondly imagining that he's along the likes of James Bond's M or La Femme Nikita's Operations ordered his boys in blue to move into one Kamlesh Paul Pattni's offices and seize tapes that allegedly show corrupt deals being arranged between the former and a dizzying array of politicians in the former and current governments.

That those tapes shall never see the light of day I do not for one second doubt!

City Hall has burnt down, just like London Bridge. Conveniently, the fire burnt down documents that touched on road reserves and city planning. I cannot be the only one who finds this laughable!

That the fire department was unable to access water because the hydrants in the vicinity had no water leaves one unable to know whether to laugh or cry.

That Local Government Assistant Minister Betty Tett can stand there blinking girlishly and announcing very proudly that as a matter of fact they have no backups of any documents leaves me speechless.

And finally the vision of the buffoonish Security Minister Chris Murungaru telling us that not one, but two task forces have been formed to deal with the issue makes me want to kick the spine out of the top of his head and beat the snot out him with it! What bloody use are still more task forces?!!!

Not done with our good lad Christopher 'Big Foot' Murungaru! No sir, not by a long shot! This laughing buffoon, in my humble opinion, needs to present his laughing face before a strong boot, and then needs the laughing teeth of his laughing mouth kicked into the back of his laughing head.

Makadara MP Reuben Ndolo while rejoicing at the reception his constituents are giving him, wonders how he can communicate to them that they are giving him a wedgie like no other.

This particular one, though completely involuntary on the part of the constituents, is so effective he can taste the very cotton of his inner garments

If you happen to have Macromedia Dreamweaver just do a spell check for the word 'Murungaru'. Top on the list of close matches is the word 'Urinary'. And we say artificial intelligence is impossible!

Bush. CIA. Osama. Bomb. Al Qaeda. Saddam Hussein. Chemical Ali. Bowling Ali. Dimly Lit Ali. Dead End Ali.

Blu Cantrell would rather be known for her music than her adult entertainment proficiency. In other words she'd rather be known as a vocalist than an oralist