Visit the past archives of my assorted ramblings
Issue 69 (Mon March 8) :Big Brother, Pattni Edition, London Bridge Burning Down and buffoonishly inept security ministers!
Information desk

5 March: Total Motor Show
7 March: FA Cup Quarter Finals
21 March: Joy - you're an old bag!
28 March: Arsenal - Man U. GO GUNNERS!
1 April: THIS IS YOUR DAY!

The Kenyan Pundit
Jozie's
Mental Acrobatics

A heartfelt LETTER FROM GOMORRAH
A BEAUTY PAEGENT like no other!
THIS IS A DREAM!
SOCCER MANIA - clash of the titans
DO TELL ... Questions that beggar an answer!
Keep up to date. Visit the INFORMATION DESK
EULOGIES should be more along these line s ...
THE GIRLS PLAY BALL
INTELLIGENCE is not as common as you think!
Fun and games at a UNIVERSITY RIOT!
There are SOME DAYS ...
A KUMI KUMI Guide for the novices. A MUST read!
A POEM for someone special!
DEAREST JOHN: John Doe's better half replies with energy to issues raised by her worse half!
DEAREST JANE: A man addresses issues such as crossing rivers for his be loved ...
FAVOURITE MOVIES Some notable personalities share their favourite flicks
PRESS RELEASE FROM THE AFGHANISTANI BROADCASTING CORPORATION The proprietor of Afghanistan's first TV studio shares his visions
DEDICATIONS: Music is the language of the heart -- touching messages to loved and not so loved ones

Just when I think things cannot get any more ridiculous our old friend Murphy, the genius that came up with Murphy's Laws continues to smile to himself wherever he is as things precisely get more ridiculous!

My best friends and even enemies will inform you I am an extremely liberal fellow and am fairly thick skinned. But one thing that really gets my goat is self righteous hypocrisy that seems to be a spreading vice in our hapless populace!

The reception with which i took in the news that the basement of Times Towers, HQ of the Kenya Revenue Authority and storage place of wealth declaration forms was on fire was one of gross amusement. Around the Casa there was growing concern that I was going to rupture something with all the laughing I was doing.

Now then, there is a building called Town House in downtown Nairobi. A chap masquerading as a freelance journalist negotiated a night of fun and games with a leading lady of the night and brought her to his office and very soon was very hard at work. There was little doubt that he was putting his back into it.

For the slower ones amongst us the investigation he was doing was more of the biological kind than the journalistic.

After a hard night's work the chap refused to pay for the rendered services. The skilled professional, who had bent over backwards in her duty felt that she was entitled to her dues.

A scene was raised resulting in the security staff of the building appearing and some real KTN reporters. What followed I freely confessed left me speechless with amazed outrage.

The guards quite literally threw her out of the building. She actually bounced down the steps of the front and for good measure was thrown against a car.

And then - this is really what gets my goat - ASSININE IDLE KENYANS, complete with suits who should be building their country flood the scene and the opportunistic folks try to strip her. Hands pulled her hair and blouse. Other, more opportunist hands pulled other regions altogether. Even more opportunist hands tried to find out if silicon enhancement was part of her surgical history. Still more opportunistic fellers tried to find out if there was any more room for them, in those jeans.

Yep, dudes in suits whose candy arses should be at work quite shamelessly sticking hands where they have no business. Who on earth gave people the right to appoint themselves moral police? Beating and stripping her FOR WHAT? It was private business between a willing buyer and a willing seller. Nothing to do with you. No one was injured, no one was stolen from. But cats were carrying on as if an atrocity had been committed!!!!

And what crowned matters off was a cretin in a shirt so yellow who for a second scared us into thinking a solar eclipse was taking place who ACTUALLY QUOTED THE BIBLE telling us "adulterers will never inherit the earth". Let me quote a book of my own for this lad [The RADical Book Of Life]

Besides urging this chap to get his self righteously ignorant face bitch slapped at the first opportunity, I'd also like to remind him that the same Bible urges "those without sin to cast the first stone!"

I can't believe the HYPOCRICY of Man!!!

Much as the profession of the press is hazardous, the story has always got to be told.

And this reporter right here is taking no chances when filming one Michael Jackson. He's keeping a very safe distance indeed from the gentleman.

Recent photos of the great and legendary James Brown have cast some doubt into the authenticity of some of his greatest hits.

Chief among the hits to suffer this authenticity doubt are "I Feel Good" and "Sex Machine"

It was bad enough that some schmuck redid 50 Cent's In Da Club in Kiswahili. Now yet another poor schmuck has done Marques Houston's Clubbin' in Kiswahili!

And we claim Kenyan music is going places?!

Bush. CIA. Osama. Bomb. Al Qaeda. Saddam Hussein. Chemical Ali. Bowling Ali. Dimly Lit Ali. Dead End Ali.

Blu Cantrell would rather be known for her music than her adult entertainment proficiency. In other words she'd rather be known as a vocalist than an oralist