Plot:
Criswell, psychic, talks about the future and about this true story based on actual testimony of eyewitnesses.
A dark and stormy night, see title credits on gravestones. This movie has special guest stars. Ed Wood directed, wrote, and produced. Friends, quality must ensue.
At a funeral, Criswell is giving a narration concerning death. Bela Lugosi is distraught over the death of his wife. The mourners leave as the grave diggers fill the
grave.
Plane is about to land, the pilot Jeff Trent spots a strange light. It’s a flying saucer. He contacts the radio tower and is told to keep it from the plane’s passengers.
UFO continues flying before landing at the cemetery at night. The grave diggers are working obviously during the day. They hear a noise and leave. Vampira
glides out. This is one scary looking woman: a pale woman with a 17-inch waist and 6 inch fingernails. She could teach the white-faced-witch-like woman with
killer-claws from Evil Brain From Outer Space a lot. We hear screaming as the scene ends abruptly.
The next day, Bela leaves his house. Criswell pontificates on Bela’s grief. Bela picks a flower and walks off screen. We hear a scream and screeching
tires. An ambulance races along.
At the cemetery, people leave Bela’s mausoleum. It looks like it was designed by the clown car people. There is no way that many people could fit inside
it. Maybe, it’s like Dr. Who’s TARDIS. Vampira watches from a distance, ever silently. A couple leaves the mausoleum, and the wife sees the dead grave diggers…
Cops race to the graveyard. Inspector Daniel Clay is in charge. I’m not going to call him clay again. It’s Tor Johnson, 400 pound Swedish wrestler! He looks
alone for clues. The cops investigate the area around the bodies until the morgue wagon arrives.
Jeff Trent, the pilot, is at home with his wife, Paula. He’s moody about the whole UFO deal and tells her about it. The military doesn’t want him telling
anyone. But, Jeff knows what he saw. A strange light flashes past them. And, the couple is knocked to their feet.
At the cemetery, the cops are stunned by the same light. They get back to their feet. Tor sees the UFO land and passes by Bela’s mausoleum. The mausoleum
door opens, and the cape wearing fake Bela Lugosi appears. NOTE: This guy is 6 inches taller than Bela, wears the cape to hide his face. Actually, fake Bela is
the producer’s wife’s chiropractor.
Fake Bela follows Tor. Tor spots him and opens fire. Bullets are useless. The cops rush to where they hear the shots. The cops find Tor, dead. Cops are
unsure whether the saucer they saw had anything to do with Tor’s death. But, they’ll find the killer.
The police attend the funeral of Inspector Tor, while Vampira watches from afar.
Saucers fly overhead and are spotted. We get the spinning newspaper montage sequence. The saucers fly over Hollywood, montage, too. They’re seen over
Washington D.C. Troops are activated.
Don't mind us, just want to destroy your world...
The army led by Colonel Edwards readies to attack. Stock footage of army loading howitzers, etc….The saucers are shot at to no avail. They fly away, but not
home. The army is unable to track them on radar. Edwards tells of how we tried communicating with the saucers to no avail. They attacked a town, granted a small
town… The higher-ups covered up the massacre of that small town. Stock footage of fighter jets hunting for the saucers.
The saucer docks with the mother ship to receive repairs. The aliens have tried contacting Earth’s various governments, but they refused to reply. High
Muckity-muckity Leader orders that Plan 9 be implemented. The plan is to raise the dead. So far, 2 corpses have been reanimated. No living Earthers have seen
them. High Muckity orders Eros to continue with Plan 9 and, his saucer heads back to Earth.
Jeff is about to leave, afraid for Paula left alone near the cemetery where everything has been happening. Jeff thinks something strange is going on in the
cemetery. With such a master of the obvious, the plane he flies must be very secure. He leaves. Later on, in mid-flight Jeff is distracted. By the cemetery and
saucers…The stewardess convinces him to call someone to check on Paula.
Fake Bela Lugosi is walking around the cemetery in his cape. The phone rings and Paula answers it. Fake Bela sneaks into the house. The bedroom door
opens. Paula beats feet to escape the Fake Bela who follows behind her slowly. Vampira watches Paula run through the cemetery. We see throbbing, your minds
out of the gutter, throbbing earth erupt from a grave. Vampira chases Paula who spots the zombie 400 pound Tor rise from his grave.
I am Torrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!
Tor slowly walks in a stumbling lurching gait, while Paula is running for her life. I know the budget is cheap. But, this is where I noticed the fake Bela walk past a
grave stone that wobbles after he brushed past it. Paula runs along the road and is found by a neighbor. A few day for night shots ensue. Vampira and Tor are
nearby. Paula and the neighbor are about to drive away. When wait for it…the car won’t start. As Fake Bela approaches, the car starts.
March of the zombies begins. Police head to the cemetery. Some more day and night shots are mixed. We see Vampira and Fake Bela trudge along in the day
when the cops are searching the cemetery at night. Tor continues his ungainly gait and Vampire resumes gliding like she’s on a skateboard.
Aliens let Tor and Vampira aboard the saucer. Zombies see the aliens as prey. They cut the resurrecting ray which has them stand still. Fake Bela enters, too.
The police are unsure of what’s going on. The saucer takes off. The official feel in the police department is something funny is going on in the cemetery. The
saucer was heard taking off. The police find an empty grave. They don’t know whose grave it was. They were just there yesterday for the funeral of Inspector
Tor. But, Tor is gone.
Washington D.C. at the Pentagon, Colonel Edwards is questioned about flying saucers. Aliens have contacted the government. The military has built a language
computer to translate the alien language into English. Edwards hears the messages. Although, the aliens are extremely advanced compared to Earth, their purpose
isn’t conquest but to save Earth. And, if Earth won’t be friendly, the aliens can be hostile, too. Earth is on the verge of destroying the universe with explosives. More
on this later. Edwards is sent to California where the saucer has been spotted around a cemetery. His mission is to investigate and contact the aliens.
On the mother ship, Muckity-Muck is briefed by Eros, who shows off the zombies. The plan has to be accelerated. They need live Earthlings for some
reason. Tor is brought in and starts choking Eros Note: Eros is played by DUDLEY MANLOVE!! Tanna’s resurrection gun isn’t working. Tor is stopped at
the last minute. Muckity is impressed by Tor. Leader alters the plan use the disintegrator beam on Fake Bela. Earth is close to endangering the universe. Armies
of the dead will swarm the capitals of Earth. Eros and Tanna return to Earth.
Police car is in high speed and pulls off to the side of the road. We’ve seen this scene at least twice so far. Saucer lands in the cemetery. Colonel Edwards,
Lieutenant Harper and Patrol Kelton arrive to meet with Jeff and Paula. She tells her story. Fake Bela is sent out. They hear a noise.
Fake Bela attacks Kelton as the rest watch in horror. Bullets have no effect on him. The beam hits Fake Bela and leaves only a skeleton in cape. Our heroes
head to the cemetery. Edwards, Jeff, and Harper have guns and will search for the saucer. Kelton who recovers is to protect Paula. Our intrepid heroes check
the empty grave of Tor. Vampire watches from afar. Tor’s grave looks broken out of not broken into.
At the saucer, Eros plans to capture the Earthlings. Tor is sent to catch Kelton and Paula.
Edwards, Jeff, and Harper, or our Intrepid Heroes, spot the glow in the distance of the saucer. Tor sneaks up on Kelton who is knocked out again in less than 10
minutes. The Intrepid Heroes find the saucer and the hatch opens. They head inside.
Eros wants the men killed. The Intrepid Heroes find Eros and Tanna. They can talk or wait until Paula is brought to the saucer. On the magic screen, Tor is
shown carrying Paula to the saucer.
We get another Eros anti-Earth monologue. Harper wants to take the aliens to the police station. Tor is outside and would kill if ordered by Eros.
Larry and Kelton spot the glowing and see Tor carrying Paula. They realize guns are useless. Larry will hit Tor in the back of the head with a limb. Tor falls
over Eros watches and mentions Tor will get up when ordered to do so.
The cops head to the saucer while a fight breaks out inside. It’s Eros versus Jeff. Edwards tries getting the hatch open. Tanna tries to get the saucer off the
ground.
Jeff and Eros are ripping consoles from the saucer. The hatch is opened. Somehow, the ship is on fire. Jeff rushes out. Eros and Tanna are left inside. Tanna
tries reviving him to no effect inside the smoky saucer.
Earthers see the fiery saucer fly into the night sky. They believe more aliens will come.
Tor has turned into a skeleton. Vampira will skeletonify, too.
Tanna is crying and screaming as the saucer explodes.
Criswell tells how the preceding story is true, etc.. Earth is being watched from afar…
