Two words of caution. First, in a short article like this, it is impossible to review all of the issues that you may confront. Second, everyone's individual feelings are just that - individual. This article does not try to describe them all - just those most common among what is affectionately described as a brat.

Setting the Mood
Just like when you engage in lovemaking, setting counts for most women, setting up the spanking counts for most 'brats' (grown women who want to receive disciplinary spankings either in role playing or for real 'infractions.'). For most women, the mental aspect of the spanking is much more important than the physical. It starts with that look. You don't need to say much. It is in your voice, your look, and your demeanor. Brats want to push you until you draw the line and make them pay the consequence for their behavior. If your mate wants to 'play' in this way, don't worry about what she is saying to you when you are scolding and telling her how you are going to spank her, watch her actions. Does she still push? Does she get mouthy? Do you get her attention with your scolding? Does she start to say she is sorry? If she does any of these, you have started to set the mood.

Don't be in a hurry. Take your time. Always stay in control, requiring behavior (like having to 'fetch' the wooden hairbrush or other instrument of correction). If she doesn't obey you, instantly add another punishment. Possibly counting penalty strokes (i.e., swats that are delivered after the punishment would otherwise be completed.).

Vocabulary
Brats like certain words when connected with spanking. Practice them so they sound natural when you use them in a threat. Words like naughty, bare bottom, behavior, young lady and miss are all key words for a 'brat.' Of course the word spank usually gets their attention.

Phrases are also important. Here are a few: "Do you understand, young lady?" "I'll give you something to cry about, miss." "Assume the position!" "Get your naughty bottom over here" "unacceptable" "look at me young lady" and "pull down your panties." Just think back to when you were a child or teen and remember all of those phrases that people in authority might have used to get you to straighten up. These words help to take her away from today's responsibility and assist her in giving over control.

Warm up, warm up, and warm up!!!
Perhaps this is the most important element of giving a good disciplinary spanking. It happens all the time. The wife or girlfriend tries to get her mate to give her a good spanking, sometimes specifically asking for this type of relationship and after she gets spanked, she complains. Not in her brat mode but in reality. She says it was too hard. What she is probably telling you is that you didn't give her a warm up.

First, what is a warm up then why give it. A warm up is a light spanking that builds over a period of minutes or even an hour or more. Take your time and spank lightly for minutes and minutes. Take your time building the sting across her bottom. Often the young lady will start to sass even more because she is starting to get the attention she seeks but it is not hard enough. This is especially true when a young lady is receiving her first taste of over-the-knee justice. She thinks (incorrectly) that it doesn't sting as much as she thinks it might. Just smile and keep on warming up. You will build the intensity until she changes her attitude. Don't think you need to spank harder.

During a warm up it is important to spread the hand spanks or light hairbrush or paddle strokes (always start with your hand first) all across her cheeks. Concentrate where the thighs and bottom meet. NEVER spank high. Keep it about an inch lower than the top of her crack. Remember, you can injure her if you spank too high plus you will not have the after impact when she is sitting down.

Continue the spanks while you scold. Rest your hand on her warming cheeks to give her skin the time to warm up to the spanking. Possibly corner time is appropriate at the end of the first phrase of her warm up. Of course you don't tell her that it is a warm up or that is why you are sending her to the corner, but it works all the same.

Warm ups are important to both set the stage and prepare her skin with a good workout. The rule of thumb (or of palm) is that the longer the warm up, the more spanking she can probably take. Remember, it will increase the time she can take a spanking - something that she has craved for a long time.

Ritual
Ritual is everything. Over the knee (with one leg over her legs if necessary) or over-the-lap (more comfortable if you are sitting on a couch so it does not apply too much pressure on her stomach) is by far the most appreciated position for brats. Bending over a couch is often associated with a belt spanking or strapping. Bending over a straight back chair is often viewed as an acceptable position for penalty strokes (look above).

Ritual also means that you stay in your role of a disciplinarian during the entire 'punishment.' Sexual play or wandering fingers often is not appreciated during a disciplinary spanking even if it is your wife or girlfriend. There very well may be time for such activities after she has 'paid the price.'

Holding her chin during a scolding, making her look into your eyes when you lecture her (remember to throw in those 'spanking words,' various instruments that are just used for punishment (wooden spoon, wooden hairbrush, leather belt, etc....all after the warm up spanking with your palm) also add to the ritual.

Reward
For many of us (those of us known as 'spanker men'), giving a disciplinary spanking alone is our reward. But as a spouse of a 'brat,' you get at least two rewards. First, and foremost, you will know that you are fulfilling a very special part of your significant other's life. Many women go through their entire life wishing they could get some traditional discipline and never have the nerve to disclose their need. It will bring your relationship closer. And then there is always the other reward most 'brats' will give their spouse or boyfriend after they have been o-t-ked. Then again, maybe you will learn to like the actual activity. It has been known to happen.