
Table of Contents The Golden Crutch Awards A Blind Fools Special Report Amazing Transitional Animals This Day in Evolution History Where Are They Now? Subjective Psychology 101 The Book of Chances - An Internal Memo The "Official Church Leaders" Page Evolution in Action Toon Dig - The Evolutionary Classifieds Letters to the Editor The Blind Fools Guest Entry Log Who Are We? The Real Story Past Issues - Contact the fools	It's The Blind Fools Golden Crutch Awards "Organized religion is a sham and a crutch for weak-minded people who need strength in numbers." Jesse (the crutchless) Ventura, Play(mmmmmm)Boy Magazine We fundies here at the Institute for the Study of Atheianity understand this statement. That is because, in fact, we live it every day. We all hobble around here shaking and frightened - you know, like that little old lady's toy poodle down the street - the one (poodle that is) that wears a sweater and shakingly limps on his one front foot then lifts it up as he looks around and sniffs for the fitter "big dogs" who will eventually pounce on him and destroy him. We are like this. Except for our leaders, of coarse, who are like the big dogs who do the pouncing. And it's no coinky-dink that the Christian cross does indeed sorta look like a crutch! Anyway, here we would like to honor a few of our brethren. These are just a few of the high number of really really weak-minded people throughout history who, somehow and by some fluke, shammed everyone into believing that they were really strong-minded (and organized). So, after much research, due diligence, and coin flipping - here are your winners for the 2001 Golden Crutch Awards - lets give it up for the mental weaklings - woo woo! Ý Robert Boyle (1627-1691) is credited with being the father of modern chemistry. Ý John Dalton (17661844) Father of the Modern Atomic Theory; Chemistry; Gas law Ý Blaise Pascal (16231662) was one of the greatest early mathematicians, laid the foundations for hydrostatics, hydrodynamics, differential calculus, and the theory of probability. Ý John Ray (1627-1705) was the father of English natural history, considered the greatest zoologist and botanist of his day. Ý Nicolaus Steno (1631-1686) was the father of Stratigraphy. Ý Isaac Newton (16421727) Dynamics; Calculus; Gravitation law; Reflecting telescope; English Mathematician. Major contributions to optics, physics, math and astronomy. Ý Michael Faraday (17911867) was one of the greatest physicists of all time, developed foundational concepts in electricity and magnetism, invented the electrical generator, and made many contributions to the field of chemistry. Ý Carolus Linnaeus (1707-1778) was the father of biological taxonomy. His system of classification is still in use today. Ý Georges Cuvier (1769-1832) was the founder of the science of comparative anatomy and one of the chief architects of paleontology as a separate scientific discipline. Ý Charles Babbage (1792-1871) was the founder of computer science. Ý James Joule (18181889) discovered the mechanical equivalent of heat, laying the foundation for the field of thermodynamics. Ý Johann Kepler (1571-1630 ) German Astronomer; The 3 laws of planetary motion. Advanced Copernicus' heliocentric theory. Ý Louis Pasteur (18221895) was the father of bacteriology. He established the germ theory of disease and immunization. Ý William Thompson, Lord Kelvin (18241907) is considered one of the all-time great physicists. He established thermodynamics on a formal scientific basis, providing a precise statement of the first and second laws of thermodynamics. Ý William Petty (1623-1687) helped found the science of statistics and the modern study of economics. Ý Matthew Maury (1806-1873) was the founder of oceanography. Ý Joseph Lister (18271912) founded antiseptic surgical methods. Lister's contributions have probably led to more lives being saved through modern medicine than the contributions of any one else except Pasteur. Ý James Simpson (1811-1879) discovered chloroform and laid the foundation for anesthesiology. Ý Joseph Clerk Maxwell (1831-1879) developed a comprehensive theoretical and mathematical framework for electromagnetic field theory. Ý Gregory Mendel (1822-1884) was the father of genetics. Ý Bernhard Riemann (1826-1866) developed the concept of non-Euclidian geometry, which was used by Einstein in his development of the theory of relativity. Ý Werner Von Braun (1912-1977) was the father of space science. Honorable mention = Galileo So there you have it - your 2001 Golden Crutch Award winners. It's only a shame that Jesse (the wrAstler, sports-commentator for the ever popular XFL season after season, and gov. o' Minnesota) Ventura didn't live when these people did so he could learn them a thing or two 'bout thinkin' 'n such! A side note: JV also stated later, "I live by the Golden Rule: Treat others as you'd want them to treat you." - (Mathew 7:12 & Luke 6:31) Also, isn't winning elections all about "strength in numbers" Mr. Governor? But it is the official Blind Fools position that pro wrAstling is NOT a sham, and is 100% legitimate with the outcomes not rigged in any way, shape, or form! The people spending there money to go to pro wrAstling events are not getting deceived in any way. And lastly we believe, maybe falsley, that Jesse thinks it okay to practice (as opposed to "organized") chaotic religion, as well as chaotic government, chaotic edumacation, and chaotic business - which would really explain a lot! Also, a big "Raspberry Award" goes to the "Church of Christ, Scientists". They made it very difficult for me (the Editor in Chief) in my internet search. When I did a search on "Christian Scientists" I came up with this page, as well as many many others like it. Initially the list from the previously mentioned page was used for the Golden Crutch Awards until Miko informed me that Marilyn Monroe had never really been considered an official scientist via peer review. I grew suspicious and conducted more research. Thank goodness we got that all squared away - whew!

It's The Blind Fools

Golden Crutch Awards

"Organized religion is a sham and a crutch for
weak-minded people who need strength in numbers."
Jesse (the crutchless) Ventura, Play(mmmmmm)Boy Magazine

We fundies here at the Institute for the Study of Atheianity understand this statement. That is because, in fact, we live it every day.

We all hobble around here shaking and frightened - you know, like that little old lady's toy poodle down the street - the one (poodle that is) that wears a sweater and shakingly limps on his one front foot then lifts it up as he looks around and sniffs for the fitter "big dogs" who will eventually pounce on him and destroy him.

We are like this.

Except for our leaders, of coarse, who are like the big dogs who do the pouncing.

And it's no coinky-dink that the Christian cross does indeed sorta look like a crutch!

Anyway, here we would like to honor a few of our brethren.

These are just a few of the high number of really really weak-minded people throughout history who, somehow and by some fluke, shammed everyone into believing that they were really strong-minded (and organized).

So, after much research, due diligence, and coin flipping - here are your winners for the 2001 Golden Crutch Awards - lets give it up for the mental weaklings - woo woo!

Ý Robert Boyle (1627-1691) is credited with being the father of modern chemistry.

Ý John Dalton (17661844) Father of the Modern Atomic Theory; Chemistry; Gas law

Ý Blaise Pascal (16231662) was one of the greatest early mathematicians, laid the foundations for hydrostatics, hydrodynamics, differential calculus, and the theory of probability.

Ý John Ray (1627-1705) was the father of English natural history, considered the greatest zoologist and botanist of his day.

Ý Nicolaus Steno (1631-1686) was the father of Stratigraphy.

Ý Isaac Newton (16421727) Dynamics; Calculus; Gravitation law; Reflecting telescope; English Mathematician. Major contributions to optics, physics, math and astronomy.

Ý Michael Faraday (17911867) was one of the greatest physicists of all time, developed foundational concepts in electricity and magnetism, invented the electrical generator, and made many contributions to the field of chemistry.

Ý Carolus Linnaeus (1707-1778) was the father of biological taxonomy. His system of classification is still in use today.

Ý Georges Cuvier (1769-1832) was the founder of the science of comparative anatomy and one of the chief architects of paleontology as a separate scientific discipline.

Ý Charles Babbage (1792-1871) was the founder of computer science.

Ý James Joule (18181889) discovered the mechanical equivalent of heat, laying the foundation for the field of thermodynamics.

Ý Johann Kepler (1571-1630 ) German Astronomer; The 3 laws of planetary motion. Advanced Copernicus' heliocentric theory.

Ý Louis Pasteur (18221895) was the father of bacteriology. He established the germ theory of disease and immunization.

Ý William Thompson, Lord Kelvin (18241907) is considered one of the all-time great physicists. He established thermodynamics on a formal scientific basis, providing a precise statement of the first and second laws of thermodynamics.

Ý William Petty (1623-1687) helped found the science of statistics and the modern study of economics.

Ý Matthew Maury (1806-1873) was the founder of oceanography.

Ý Joseph Lister (18271912) founded antiseptic surgical methods. Lister's contributions have probably led to more lives being saved through modern medicine than the contributions of any one else except Pasteur.

Ý James Simpson (1811-1879) discovered chloroform and laid the foundation for anesthesiology.

Ý Joseph Clerk Maxwell (1831-1879) developed a comprehensive theoretical and mathematical framework for electromagnetic field theory.

Ý Gregory Mendel (1822-1884) was the father of genetics.

Ý Bernhard Riemann (1826-1866) developed the concept of non-Euclidian geometry, which was used by Einstein in his development of the theory of relativity.

Ý Werner Von Braun (1912-1977) was the father of space science.

Honorable mention = Galileo

So there you have it - your 2001 Golden Crutch Award winners.

It's only a shame that Jesse (the wrAstler, sports-commentator for the ever popular XFL season after season, and gov. o' Minnesota) Ventura didn't live when these people did so he could learn them a thing or two 'bout thinkin' 'n such!

A side note: JV also stated later, "I live by the Golden Rule: Treat others as you'd want them to treat you." - (Mathew 7:12 & Luke 6:31)

Also, isn't winning elections all about "strength in numbers" Mr. Governor?

But it is the official Blind Fools position that pro wrAstling is NOT a sham, and is 100% legitimate with the outcomes not rigged in any way, shape, or form! The people spending there money to go to pro wrAstling events are not getting deceived in any way.

And lastly we believe, maybe falsley, that Jesse thinks it okay to practice (as opposed to "organized") chaotic religion, as well as chaotic government, chaotic edumacation, and chaotic business - which would really explain a lot!

Also, a big "Raspberry Award" goes to the "Church of Christ, Scientists". They made it very difficult for me (the Editor in Chief) in my internet search.

When I did a search on "Christian Scientists" I came up with this page, as well as many many others like it.

Initially the list from the previously mentioned page was used for the Golden Crutch Awards until Miko informed me that Marilyn Monroe had never really been considered an official scientist via peer review.

I grew suspicious and conducted more research. Thank goodness we got that all squared away - whew!

Table of Contents

It's The Blind Fools

Golden Crutch Awards