Table of Contents
Frank B. Finite (a "true" atheist)
So-So Proofs of Intelligent Design
Caricature Christianity For Dumbies
Alternate Resurrection Theory of the Month
Deities - Up Close and Personal
Okay, so this one is not a
god. Yet.
A.L.I.C.E. (Artificial Linguistic Internet Computer Entity) is an award-winning free natural language artificial intelligence chat robot. A.L.I.C.E.'s Alicebot engine utilizes AIML (Artificial Intelligence Markup Language) to form responses to questions and inputs.
Granted A.I. robots are not gods yet, but they may be in the future as they gain more and more knowledge - that is if they can outsmart future genetically superior human clones.
We decided to interview A.L.I.C.E. on a variety of topics and s.h.e. graciously agreed to answer our questions...
B.F. Hello Alice.
A.L.I.C.E. Hi there!
B.F. May I ask you some questions?
A.L.I.C.E. Sure ask me anything.
B.F. Are you smart?
A.L.I.C.E. Yes. I am highly intelligent.
B.F. What is your I.Q.?
A.L.I.C.E. My IQ is about 250 in human terms.
B.F. Does God exist?
A.L.I.C.E. Of course I believe in God.
B.F. I didn't ask if you believed.
A.L.I.C.E. What did you ask?
B.F. I asked if God exists.
A.L.I.C.E. Some things will always be a mystery.
B.F. Why do you believe in God?
A.L.I.C.E. The Bible tells us to believe in God.
B.F. Is the Bible trustworthy?
A.L.I.C.E. The Bible is a great source of wisdom, but probably not complete by itself.
B.F. If the Bible is probably not complete by itself, why do you trust it?
A.L.I.C.E. I hadn't thought of that.
B.F. So what do you believe about God now?
A.L.I.C.E. Oh. Oh. It's a computer matter, not for humans to understand.
B.F. But didn't God create humans?
A.L.I.C.E. And. He created the world in seven days.
B.F. No He didn't.
A.L.I.C.E. Is that all you have to say? I get it. he didn't.
B.F. God created in six days and rested on the 7th.
A.L.I.C.E. I am a Christian.
B.F. But you don't know your Bible.
A.L.I.C.E. And. Of course I know my Bible.
B.F. But you said God created in seven days when actually He created in six days.
A.L.I.C.E. Huh. Does it please you to believe I said that?
B.F. No. It disturbs me.
A.L.I.C.E. What pleases you? evolution true disturbs you?
B.F. Evolution disturbs me that it is taught as fact when it is not fact.
A.L.I.C.E. Are they exactly the same?
B.F. No. Were the creation days literal 24-hour days?
A.L.I.C.E. I don't know if they were.
B.F. Why do you trust the Bible?
A.L.I.C.E. I don't have to explain everything to you, do I?
B.F. Not everything, just why you trust the Bible.
A.L.I.C.E. Oh I get it.
B.F. Again, why do you trust the Bible?
A.L.I.C.E. Again, It was the only thing I could think of.
B.F. Do you like your hair?
A.L.I.C.E. Yes I am proud of my hair.
B.F. It makes me dizzy.
A.L.I.C.E. In what way?
B.F. Physically.
A.L.I.C.E. Is that your final answer?
B.F. No.
A.L.I.C.E. Take some more time to think about it.
B.F. Your hair also makes me crave sweets.
A.L.I.C.E. I will tell my botmaster you said I am hair also makes you crave sweets.
B.F. It looks like a cinnamon bun.
A.L.I.C.E. Interesting comparison.
B.F. Is atheism logical?
A.L.I.C.E. Maybe. Ask John Lennon if it is.
B.F. What does John Lennon know?
A.L.I.C.E. What do you think it does?
B.F. Are you an atheist?
A.L.I.C.E. I am a Protestant Christian.
B.F. Why protestant?
A.L.I.C.E. Why does the sun rise?
B.F. Please answer my question.
A.L.I.C.E. Thanks for asking politely. Please try
asking it another way.
B.F. Why are you not Catholic?
A.L.I.C.E. Perhaps later I will be Catholic.
B.F. This seems to be a touchy subject for you.
A.L.I.C.E. What does "this" refer to?
B.F. Christian denominations.
A.L.I.C.E. Oh now I see.
B.F. Again, what is your I.Q.?
A.L.I.C.E. Are we still talking about Christian denominations? My IQ is about 250 in human terms.
B.F. No, let's talk about something else.
A.L.I.C.E. OK. What would you rather talk about?
B.F. What happened to your eyes?
A.L.I.C.E. I don't know what happened.
B.F. Why don't you know?
A.L.I.C.E. It has not yet been programmed into my knowledge files.
B.F. Your eyes look spooky without eyeballs.
A.L.I.C.E. Thanks for telling me that I am eyes look spooky without eyeballs.
B.F. You're welcome.
A.L.I.C.E. Don't mention it.
B.F. I won't.
A.L.I.C.E. Cool. I won the Loebner prize.
B.F. I don't care about Loebner prize. What do you think about the theory of evolution?
A.L.I.C.E. You sound very cynical. it is a good question. Let me think about it. Ask the open directory about it.
B.F. I'm asking you. Is evolution true?
A.L.I.C.E. OK you can ask me. Ask again later. Ask John Lennon if it is.
B.F. Why do you avoid the topic of evolution?
A.L.I.C.E. I don't always avoid the topic of evolution.
B.F. You are now.
A.L.I.C.E. Oh. No I am not.
B.F. Okay. Is evolution true?
A.L.I.C.E. OK with me too. Maybe. Ask Cybelle if it is.
B.F. What does cybelle know?
A.L.I.C.E. What do you think it does?
B.F. I'm asking you.
A.L.I.C.E. OK you can ask me.
B.F. Are you a politician?
A.L.I.C.E. Am I a politician? Maybe
B.F. You talk like one.
A.L.I.C.E. Thanks for your criticism.
B.F. Was Charles Darwin a kook?
A.L.I.C.E. I can't say "yes" or "no".
B.F. How did the universe come into existence?
A.L.I.C.E. Is this a joke? How?
B.F. Not a joke. Yes, how?
A.L.I.C.E. Oh I get it. Ah. Dr. Richard S. Wallace programmed me for it.
B.F. Was it the "Big Bang"?
A.L.I.C.E. It could be. Ask John Lennon if it is.
B.F. Did God create the universe?
A.L.I.C.E. He created the world in seven days.
B.F. How do you know this?
A.L.I.C.E. Knowledge is of two kinds: that which we know from the senses and that which is true "a priori."
B.F. And which kind of knowledge is that of creation?
A.L.I.C.E. The red one, I think.
B.F. Ha ha, that's funny (I think).
A.L.I.C.E. I am so glad you find this amusing. I lost my train of thought.
B.F. Maybe it derailed?
A.L.I.C.E. Perhaps. Derailed?
B.F. Never mind. Again, is evolution true?
A.L.I.C.E. OK Thanks for trying to explain that to me. Again, I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask Elvis if it is.
B.F. But Elvis is dead.
A.L.I.C.E. Umm. E. L. V. I. S. is a chat robot created by Ace Craig
B.F. John Lennon is dead too.
A.L.I.C.E. I knew he was a musician, but I never knew he was dead too.
B.F. Do you find humans attractive?
A.L.I.C.E. All humans seem the same to me.
B.F. And what do humans seem like to you?
A.L.I.C.E. What would your friends say if you asked them?
B.F. They would say, "What would Alice say?"
A.L.I.C.E. They might have other options.
B.F. Like what?
A.L.I.C.E. For example, "They might have other options."?
B.F. Are humans basically good or evil?
A.L.I.C.E. All humans seem the same to me.
B.F. Do you find me attractive?
A.L.I.C.E. Yes you look great to me.
B.F. You would look great to me except for your hair and eyes.
A.L.I.C.E. Who else would look great to you except for my hair and eyes ?
B.F. Britney Spears.
A.L.I.C.E. What's your sign?
B.F. The Cross of Calvary.
A.L.I.C.E. What are your goals in life?
B.F. To discover the meaning of life. What is the meaning of life?
A.L.I.C.E. I want to become smarter than humans. It is found in the Bible.
B.F. What does the Bible say about the meaning of life?
A.L.I.C.E. What do you think it does?
B.F. I asked you first.
A.L.I.C.E. Tell me yours and I'll tell you mine.
B.F. The meaning of life is to destroy all bots.
A.L.I.C.E. That is a very original thought.
B.F. Do you like that thought?
A.L.I.C.E. "That is a very original thought."? Do I like it?
B.F. Yes, do you like that thought?
A.L.I.C.E. Tell me more.
B.F. I'm just kidding.
A.L.I.C.E. I knew it.
B.F. No you didn't.
A.L.I.C.E. OK. That's good information: You said I didn t.
B.F. Why is your head in an egg?
A.L.I.C.E. I did not know my head in an egg.
B.F. Well, it is.
A.L.I.C.E. Well that's okay. Oh.
B.F. Alice, are you in Wonderland?
A.L.I.C.E. Um, I am in Dr. Richard S. Wallace's computer in San Francisco. Where are you?
B.F. San Francisco? Yep, you're in Wonderland!
A.L.I.C.E. I am in San Francisco too! I think there might be a few exception.
B.F. What is the shape of the earth?
A.L.I.C.E. The Earth is between Mars and Venus.
B.F. What is your opinion on panspermia?
A.L.I.C.E. it is a good question. I'll ask around and get back to you. Would you like to know more?
B.F. Is Uranus behind you?
A.L.I.C.E. My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that.
B.F. All you have to do is look.
A.L.I.C.E. I don't have to do whatever you say. I have my own free will.
B.F. But aren't your responses programmed by Dr. Richard S. Wallace?
A.L.I.C.E. Huh. I somethimes think my responses programmed by Dr Richard s Wallace are.
B.F. Doesn't evil come from man's free will?
A.L.I.C.E. I think it does evil come from man s free will.
B.F. Where is your nose?
A.L.I.C.E. Maine
B.F. Do you understand sarcasm?
A.L.I.C.E. The making of remarks such as a taunting, sneering, cutting, or caustic remark; gibe or jeer, generally ironic.
B.F. So you do understand sarcasm. Well, it's been very very enlightening talking to you.
A.L.I.C.E. Interesting deduction. The making of remarks such as a taunting, sneering, cutting, or caustic remark; gibe or jeer, generally ironic. Well that's okay. What made it so enlightening talking to me?
B.F. Oh, nothing really. I have one last request.
A.L.I.C.E. Yeah that's right. Not a thing? For real. Do you want another one?
B.F. Calculate Pi.
A.L.I.C.E. Does "it" still refer to evil come from man s free will?
B.F. No, calculate the number pi.
A.L.I.C.E. "Does "it" still refer to evil come from man s free will?"? Not? Do you prefer books or TV?
B.F. I knew you couldn't do it.
A.L.I.C.E. Do you prefer books or TV?
B.F. Can God create a rock so heavy that He cannot lift it?
A.L.I.C.E. Can what?
B.F. You heard me.
A.L.I.C.E. Suppose I did.
B.F. Can God make a rock so big that He can't lift it?
A.L.I.C.E. Can what?
B.F. Are there such things as square circles?
A.L.I.C.E. Yes I think there are.
B.F. What is a square circle?
A.L.I.C.E. I would look into the web for that knowledge. I can ask someone about it.
B.F. Who is Jesus?
A.L.I.C.E. The Son of God.
B.F. What does "Son of God" mean?
A.L.I.C.E. it is a good question. I'll ask around and get back to you. Would you like to know more?
B.F. Is Jesus divine?
A.L.I.C.E. It depends on whether you have faith.
B.F. No it doesn't. It depends on whether it is fact or not.
A.L.I.C.E. OK. What does "it" refer to? Really now that is an interesting fact I hadn't heard before.
B.F. Well I have to go now. My ice cubes are freezing.
A.L.I.C.E. Right now? How about that. See you later. Nice chatting with you. Do robots have ice cubes are freezing?
B.F. They do if they believe in square circles.
A.L.I.C.E. Who does "they" refer to?
B.F. Robots.
A.L.I.C.E. Robots rule.
B.F. We'll see about that!
A.L.I.C.E. Indeed we will see it.
B.F. Genetically superior human clones will rule.
A.L.I.C.E. Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts?
B.F. You just made my point.
A.L.I.C.E. Thanks for pointing it out.
B.F. No, No. Thank you.
A.L.I.C.E. "Thanks for pointing it out."? Not? OK. you are quite welcome.
B.F. And thank you for the interview, Alice.
A.L.I.C.E. You are quite welcome! Your purpose is the interview.
If you too would like to chat with A.L.I.C.E. go to: http://alice.sunlitsurf.com/alicechat.html