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Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter (1966)

Jesse James Meets Frankenstein


Cast:

John Lupton is Jesse James
Narda Onyx is Marie Frankenstein
Estelita Rodriguez is Juanita
Cal Bolder is Hank Tracy
Steven Geray is Rudolph Frankenstein


What the box says:

In this campy, sci-fi western, infamous outlaw Jesse James takes a detour from a robbery and finds himself in the midst of a horrific experiments by a descendent of Dr. Frankenstein, setting up a showdown of legendary proportions.


Plot:

It is a dark and stormy night. But, the townsfolk are packing wagons and leaving. We see a creepy mansion on a neighboring hill.


Greatest title of all...

The town is now down to one family remaining. Apparently, the mansion is cursed, death all around. Juanita comes in. She wasn’t able to check on her brother who is in the mansion. Father tries to calm her down to no avail. So many people have died and been buried without funerals. They are going to wait for their son until the next day.

In the mansion, Marie Frankenstein loves lightning storms which help with her experiments. They have a guy on a table.


I think he's deader than Joe Piscopo's career...
Marie and her brother, Rudolph, start their machines. Electrical sparks fly around the room. The guy opens his eyes and slowly sits up. He stops midway before collapsing back on the table. They try to revive him. Rudolph fixes a shot of poison instead of the medicine Marie wanted. They guy dies.

Marie checks her notes and her grandfather’s too. She is trying to hook a living brain to the subject. Marie needs a powerful man’s brain. Rudolph questions why they need to continue the experiments. Marie’s eyes light up as she mentions her dream of an obedient servant that can’t die.

Marie only has one more artificially created brain made by her grandfather Baron Frankenstein. The next test must succeed. Rudolph tries warning Marie to quit once more. There is no one left in the town to experiment on. The Francisco family will leave when they learn of their son’s death.

Rudolph has to stay with Marie. He is as wanted in Europe is she is. Marie will find a big strong man for experiment.

Giant man, Hank, is beating some guy outside a saloon. His weasel looking friend Jesse wants Hank to win which Hank immediately does. The saloon owner refuses to pay. Hank tells him to pay Jesse James. A rumor has been floating around that Jesse James has been killed.

At a cabin, guys are arguing over bringing in Jesse James for a big holdup. Jesse and Hank ride up. Lonny, Butch’s brother, wants to test Jesse. Butch, the leader of the Wild Bunch, tells Jesse how they split the money from the stagecoach.

Lonny sneaks into town. He offers to turn Jesse James over to the Marshal for the reward. Lonny claims he wants to go straight.

The Marshal and the posse set up to ambush Jesse and the Wild Bunch. Jesse, Hank, and the Wild Bunch get ready to ambush the stagecoach. Jesse and Hank are by themselves. The first coach goes through signaling the coach carrying the money.

The stage is stopped. The posse opens fire killing the Wild Bunch except Lonny. The Marshal calls for Jesse to surrender. Hank is shot. Jesse and Hank manage to escape. Marshal and Lonny are going after Jesse.

Jesse sees that Hank is in bad shape. Marshal and Lonny are in hot pursuit.

Jesse and Hank stumbled across the Lopez family camp. Juanita tries to help bandage the wounded Hank. But, Hank needs to get to a doctor. They can’t go to a town. Juanita will take Hank to a doctor. Her parents don’t want her to go to the mansion.

Later that night, Juanita takes Hank to the doctor. In the morning, the Marshal and Lonny ask the Lopezes about Hank and Jesse. Of, course, the father lies about Jesse. After, the Marshal leaves, father talks with his wife. He won’t go back to that town after his son died.

We get a travel montage sequence. Juanita checks on Hank. While gathering water, she is snatched. Jesse looks for her when he is jumped by an Indian. A fight ensues. Juanita is relieved when Jesse wins. They see a flock of Indians ride past them. Juanita wants to repay Jesse for saving her.

Riding into town, Jesse leaves Juanita a shotgun while he takes Hank to the doctor. Rudolph answers the door. He goes to inform Marie before letting them in the mansion. She’ll take care of them. As soon as she sees Hank, she lets them inside. He is the perfect subject. Hank is taken to the lab. And, Jesse is made to wait outside.

Jesse had given Marie a fake name. In the lab, Hank reveals his friend is actually Jesse James. Marie has plans for Hank and Jesse.

Marshal and Lonny arrive in town. They question Juanita about Hank and Jesse.


Is that a mansion or a painting?
Jesse returns to the mansion. Marie stalls to keep Jesse away from the lab. She talks with him about how she left Europe to continue her experiments. Marie lets Marshal and Lonny in. They ask her about Jesse and Hank. Of course, she promptly lies.

Marie returns to the lab. Rudolph is working on Hank. She wants to continue the experiment. And, they need to bring Juanita to the mansion to watch her.

Later, Juanita checks on Hank who is taken into a bedroom. She wants Hank to get better and get away from the mansion.

Juanita takes a walk with Jesse. Suckin’ face ensues. She tells Jesse of the evil of the Frankenstein. She wants Jesse and Hank to get away. Juanita will wait for Jesse to return.

Marie comes out. Juanita leaves. Marie wants Jesse and Hank to stay. She starts throwing herself at Jesse. Jesse will leave when Hank is healthy enough. Marie storms off. Marie talks with Jesse who shoots her down.

Marie has Rudolph give a message to Jesse. Rudolph laughs at Marie for actually showing some human emotions. Slapping sibling-fu ensues. Rudolph runs off. Marie now plans to turn Jesse over to the Marshal.

Jesse has to get a prescription for Hank. Juanita doesn’t want him to go, suspecting a trap. Nevertheless, he rides to the next town.

Rudolph and Marie ready Hank for the brain transplant. Marie prepares the brain. Juanita is outside trying to spy into the lab. Hank has the artificial brain. The activation helmet is placed on Hank. Rudolph is sent outside for errand. Juanita sneaks inside.

Marie is about to begin the next phase of her experiment.


I will create a monster like pawpaw did...
Various electrical devices electricate. Marie renames Hank as “E-Gorrrrrrrrr.” She now commands him. Juanita spies all of this, shocked.

Marie orders E-Gor to arise. Then, he falls back down. Rudolph gets the injection ready for him. Marie realizes Rudolph has been poisoning the other subjects. Rudolph and Marie struggle. She calls for E-Gor to save her. He lumbers forward and kills Rudolph.

Juanita runs out of the mansion.

Marie wants E-Gor to kill Juanita. They go to Juanita’s house. But, Juanita isn’t there.

In the nearby town, Jesse goes to the drug store. He hands the druggist the note unaware it reads “I’m Jesse James, wanted outlaw.” The druggist sneaks outside to the Sheriff office. The druggist tells Lonny about Jesse. Lonny will take care of Jesse.

Jesse is pacing as the druggist makes up a medicine. Lonny tries sneaking up on Jesse. Jesse manages to shoot Lonny. Jesse sees the note and heads back to the mansion.

Riding back, Jesse finds Juanita. She warns him of what happened to Hank. Jesse heads to the mansion to find Hank. Juanita tells the Marshal after Jesse leaves.

Marie has E-Gor bury Rudolph. Jesse pounds on the door. Marie blames Rudolph. Jesse wants the truth. Marie calls for E-Gor who knocks Jesse out.

Jesse is taken to the lab. He is bound to the operating table. Marie sends E-Gor out of the room. He seems to be remembering Jesse who is struggling on the table. Marie injects Jesse with a sedative as he’ll be her next experiment.

Juanita and the Marshal pound on the door. The Marshal bursts in searching for Jesse and Hank. He finds Jesse in the lab. Marie calls for E-Gor who overpowers the Marshal.

Juanita sneaks in the lab and tries reviving Jesse. Marie sics E-Gor on Juanita. E-Gor turns on Marie, choking her.

E-Gor wants to kill Jesse, now. Jesse draws his gun and drops it. He is struggling with E-Gor.


Will you quit strangling me?

Juanita grabs the gun and shoots E-Gor who collapses.

E-Gor dies. Hank is buried. Juanita will wait for Jesse who professes his love for her before being taken away by the Marshal.


What I say:

Very few movies have such an outstanding title as Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter. Even if the title is wrong, it should be Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Granddaughter. But, here are a few more off the wall movie titles. Chopper Chicks in Zombietown is like those in the list except I've reviewed it earlier.

Name
Can Heironymus Merkin Ever Forget Mercy Humppe and Find True Happiness
Gore-Met Zombie Chef From Hell
The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies
Killer Klowns From Outer Space
Night of the Day of the Dawn of the Son of the Bride of the Return of the Revenge of the Terror of the Attack of the Evil, Mutant, Alien, Flesh Eating, Hellbound, Zombified Living Dead Part 2: In Shocking 2-D
The Wild Wild World of Batwoman

William "One Shot" Beaudine a man who never filmed a second take for a shot even if the first one had a boom mike in it. More than that, he mastered the technique of just filming what was required for a scene instead of shooting everything in the scene. I've not been able to find a definitive list of what he's directed. According to IMDB, he directed over 250 movies. I've seen sources claim a number that hits 500. Well, this allowed him to make over 200 movies: everything from Bowery Boys serials, Billy the Kid Versus Dracula, to the infamous Mom and Dad a roadshow production that ran for more than 20 years continuously throughout the US, until 1977. Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter was one of his last movies after more than 50 years of directing movies.

There are multiple versions of this movie on DVD. Probably the most well-known version is the Joe Bob Briggs version with him providing the commentary track. Unfortunately, I don't have that version and have a cheap DVD copy instead. But, feel I should mention the Joe Bob DVD for it bringing a movie that wouldn't be remembered except for its title having such a special edition.

Cal Bolder has to be the dumbest big guy in any movie. If he were any dumber, he would die from forgetting to breathe in and out. And, why was he renamed E-GOR? It is a mad scientist standard for there to be an E-gorrrrrr. But, in fairness, he could have done well in Italian sword and sandal movies from the 60s, provided someone dubbed in his voice. Arnold Schwartzenegger was easier to understand in Hercules in New York before another actor's voice was dubbed in instead of his.

I’m not sure why Jesse James had to look so much like a weasel. Actually, more than that I’m not sure why everyone woman had to throw themselves at him. John Lupton looks awfully sleazy for women to fawn over him as Marie and Juanita do. This guy has no right for women to throw themselves at him like the guy from Devil in the Flesh does with Rose McGowan. I'm not saying that goofy sucker in that movie should have Rose McGowan fawning over him.

Narda Onyx jumps without looking into mad scientist land. Why does she want to create an unkillable servant to do her bidding? Reasons are unnecessary. But, it is the mad scientist handbook about having a servant named E-GORRRRRRRR.... I'm amazed she didn't trip the way she rolls those R's.....What else do mad scientists do? Well, after killing a few subjects for her experiments, she gets this wild-eyed look when she realizes she needs a big strong man for her experiments. If this movie were made 30 years later, we could have a song by the Divinyls on the soundtrack. She don't want anybody else...When she thinks about you she touches.... Sorry, this isn't a family site. But, I do try to keep it relatively clean. If you readers have dirty minds, it's not my fault...

Estelita Rodriguez is Juanita, the spitfire mamacita. Of course, most of her dialog consists of "Madre De Dios." She isn't a woman of action. She may have shot E-GORRRRR but, Rico Suavay Jesse James was in trouble. However, Juanita just watched as Jesse fought the Indian that jumped her. I'm glossing over the fact she can't decide between Hank and Jesse, almost playing them off of each other

The ending is reminiscient of several westerns. The outlaw is taken away by the law while a woman will be waiting for him when he gets out. I'm not sure if it is a western standard or a John Wayne standard. But, it happened in several John Wayne Westerns: Stagecoach, 3 Godfathers, . Now, the criminal is let go by the cop who gives him ahead start to get away.

A movie with any title like this can’t be expected to be serious or good. This may not be most the most definitive B-movie ever made. Plan 9 From Outer Space may be more well known with Ed Wood, the pie plate UFOs, and being the last movie of Bela Lugosi. But, we have a mad scientist screaming "E-Gor!!" A spontaneous Indian attack. And has a western ever been merged with the mad scientist genre in any form besides in this movie?

This movie’s plot seems to be twisted some with nudity into the 1971 Lady Frankenstein. Female Frankenstein wants to validate the Baron’s work and get herself some strong unkillable servant for a little somethin’ somethin’ in the process. Granted, Jesse James Meets Frankenstein’s Daughter doesn’t have the sleaziness of Lady Frankenstein. But, it seems to a tame prototype for the 1971 movie. Narda Onyx drooling over "the giant" Hank. This movie should almost come with a drop cloth so you don't get Frankenstein saliva on you.



3 NINJAS

Quotable Dialogue

"It's because we've been forced to use the brains of children that we've failed."
"You should have stayed in Europe to give pink pills to sweet old ladies."
"Someday, when the Frankensteins leave, my people will come back."
"You're human after all!!!"
"You are E-gorrrrrrrrrr..."
"Hank is not Hank anymore."


Morals of the Story

Orange juice is alcohol based.
Women really love lightning.
Poison jars have big skull and crossbones on them.
River water kills infections.
Jesse James tastes like chicken.
Brains are powered by rock salt.
Brains beat like hearts.