The Original Mission Statement of the Sasquatch Militia
Drafted May 2002
We must defend Hominoid rights and advocate equal rights for all hominoids. Fighting for this is a just and noble endeavour that should be partaken by all able-bodied and egalitarian people, who believe in equal, and not special rights for Humans, while Sasquatches ride the pine. Its time for a change, and that change can only come through love. The Love of the Sasquatch Militia for you! Please join the struggle, and be a harbinger of freedom for the oppressed, and for the repressed.
Who are we you might be asking? We are the sons of normal individuals just like you! We stand up for peace and love, but also realize the need for an organized militia of peaceful philosophers who tend to question the politically correct mind-control the New World Order bombards you with! We also question the constant discrimination against Sasquatches throughout North America. If these were humans being discriminated against, tortured, and even killed would we be so silent as this genocide is perpetrated? The answer is no! Many feel the need to ignore the plight of innocent Sasquatches so they dismiss them as 'hoaxes' and 'frauds' when in reality they are as real as you and me. How would humans like it if they were dismissed as Hoax's and frauds and not given a fair trial? I doubt any rational human would stand and watch that carnage.
Therefore it is time we humans and Sasquatches put away our feeling and work together to solve the worlds Problems. Like that one really smart Chinese Philosopher Human said "A journey of 1000 miles begins with 1 step, therefore seek simplicity in small things" We need to end the feuding and instead focus on love, tolerance, and celebrate our shared values!
Fight For Tolerance My Brothers!
Prince Makes it official -
He's a closet Stomptrooper
February 23rd 2005
Sasquatch News is now confirming reports that the artist formerly known as the artist formerly known as Prince has officially renounced his career as a pop superstar and has moved on to pursue a career in the Cascadian Army. He has made public the fact that for the last 3 months he's been secretly attending Sasquatch Militia boot camp and is now a full-fledged stomptrooper. After chatting with friends and advisors he decided that his performance at the Grammy's would be his last. He made the decision to come "out of the closet and be proud of the man I am" before a recent concert in Seattle when he saw first hand the amount of Yeti fans present in the audience and finally accepted the truth of hominoid biodiversity.
Copyright 2005. A collaboration of Sasquatch Militia University (SMU) School of Technology and Sciences and the Sasquatch Militia's Minister of Propaganda. Uncle Sas Image courtesy of Lyle Zapatopi.. Sasquatch Press reports and Sasquatch News Service have contributed to the making of this site. Tax-exempt under Cascadian statute 707. All Rights reserved. Sasquatch_Militia@yahoo.com
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Yeti Win Big in Iraq Elections!
A victory for Hominoid equality.
February 3rd 2004
Baghdad, Iraq - In a surprise ending to a surprisingly successful election in Iraq, two Yeti political parties have garnered enough votes to be considered the winner. The Iraq-Yeti alliance and the Yeti Peace and Prosperity party each have polled between 15-20% of the electorate and will be certified the winners of the election next Tuesday. The victory is staggering in and of itself, but consider the fact that non-humans were not even allowed to vote and it becomes even more remarkable. Treeve N. Furele, the foremost authority on democracy and Sasquatch egalitarianism commented "The human population of Iraq was probably upset over the failure of Human governance whether it was the British, the Hashemites, or Saddam Hussein, Iraqi's have been mistreated. Now under the guidance of a Yeti government hope is again possible for Iraq."
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