1,000,001 Things I Wish I Had Said First

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

L is for Liberty--the right to obey the police.

          Bertrand Russell

Ladies and gentlemen, it is a great pleasure to be with you today. For immediate release only.

          Joe Montoya

Late to rise and later to bed makes a man tired, wired, and dead.

          French saying

Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects.

          anonymous

Lead us in a few words of silent prayer.

          Bill Peterson

Let everyone sweep in front of his own door, and the whole world will be clean.

          Johann von Göthe

Let me ask you a question, for your information.

          attributed to Gregory Ratoff

Let me live beneath your spell When you do that voodoo that you do so well.

          Cole Porter

Let us drink to the queer old dean.

          William Spooner

Let's bring it up to date with some snappy nineteenth-century dialogue.

          Samuel Goldwyn

Let's face it: all radio stations in Indianapolis suck. We just suck less.

          promo, Indianapolis radio station

Let's have some new cliches.

          Samuel Goldwyn

Let's have spontaneous fun--and here's how.

          the Singapore Straits Times

Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.

          George Bernard Shaw

Life goes on, reports indicate.

          unknown

Life is a tale told by an idiot--full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

          William Shakespeare

Life is indeed precious, and I believe the death penalty helps to affirm this fact.

          Edward Koch

Life is too important to be taken seriously.

          Oscar Wilde

Life's a pretty good ride. Let's get in line, and let's damn well sit in the front car.

          unknown

Light pranks add zest to your services, but don't pull the customer's ears.

          Japanese Tourist Industry Board, Rules for Hotel
          Chambermaids, 1936

Little children who could neither walk nor talk were running about in the streets cursing their Maker.

          Sir Boyle Roche

London (AP). Misy J orld2 Iceland's Hofi Karlsdhair xiz to Gyekjavpl hn Fripbya wion a smil p mzssaage for Soviet Leader Mikhwil Gorsachee and U1.S Pgzxident Gonald Reagwn who she hoces to meets. "It's a pewceful vhagntrif..." she ywid.

          Indonesian Times

Look, I want to give the high five symbol to high tech. . . . The truth is, it reminds a lot of people of the way I pitch horseshoes. Would you believe some of the people? Would you believe our dog?

          George Bush

Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I had to kill because they pissed me off.

          Jack Brown

Lou Gehrig died of Lou Gehrig's Disease. How could you not see that coming?

          Dennis Leary

Love comes from blindness, friendship from knowledge.

          Comte de Bussy-Rabutin

Love your neighbors, but don't pull down the fence.

          Chinese proverb

Low earnings seem to be the key reason why someone who usually works full time is a member of a poor family.

          U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics