I have submitted some new words to be included in the next edition of the Oxford English Dictionary. I just thought I'd give you all a heads up on the new words so that you may begin to impress everyone you know with your prior knowledge them.
HIPPÉ: Descriptive of someone who stops washing regularly, becomes a vegetarian, starts walking around in bare feet, and purchases a large, deceptively inexpensive bag with tiny pieces of mirror sewn onto the outside from an upmarket new age store.
BOGANTIC: Particularly bogan, i.e. "the chicken parma counter meal I had at Chelsea Heights was bogantic".
PROSTEST: The kind of protest which, in the end, will not/does not achieve piss. Governments world wide are currently in the process of removing the word 'protest' from the English language in favour of the word 'prostest'. In the future, if you actually wish to 'protest' something you will now only be able to 'object'. However, it is likely that the word 'object' will also be removed so that you will soon only be able to 'abject'.
AUSUMN: Something so crap it seems to fall from the trees and coat the pavement and nature strips, gather in festering piles in gutters and clog up your drainpipes.
AUSUMNAL: When you can smell in the air that something very 'ausumn' is about to happen.
SPASTICHE: 1) Designer spastic, a.k.a. a classy fuck-knuckle. Side note: The term 'classy fuck-knuckle is actually 'bogantic'. 2) Descriptive of someone after the consuption of a few too many free glasses of champagne at a formal function.
RECATERPI: To reverse engineer a butterfly, i.e. the process by which the spectacular plumage and grace of a young PR/Marketing chick with free tickets to a special event (eg. the Caulfield Cup) gradually becomes more and more disgraceful as the day progresses and she becomes increasingly 'spastiche'.
I'm sure you'll have no trouble working those words into everyday conversation.
On another note, to everyone who is joining me at the Caulfield Cup tomorrow, I look forward to consuming much bourbon with you all. It should be a bogantic day and I look forward to getting mildly spastiche with you. To everyone else who piked (to which I greatly prostest), I hope you have a lovely ausumnal day.
You can email the Gold Logie winning Stilt-boy at jimjimbo75@yahoo.com.au
Go ahead, ask him a question... or offer him sexual favors, he'd like that...
