If you read a review below and want to go to that article, simply use the freefind search engine at the top left of this page. Either write in the author's name or title of the submission and it will take you to it.
Cassie Hanaway
Critique Page Editor
Reviews For May 13- May 19
CRITIQUE OF THE WEEK
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name = Bob Schackner
Story_author = It Can't End Like This... by Gary Gordon
Points = 5 points
opinion of the story and author = Whoa! Gary's decriptions are so lifelike in this story. I actually saw what he was decribing. I cringed a few times near the end as Gary led my imagination down the path. The end was not what I expected and I although I'm the hopeless romantic and enjoy a happy ending, I occasionally like it when the good guy doesn't always do well. Great job Gary...please keep writing!
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name = GAYLE THOMPSON
Poem_author = Pan's Seduction by Megan Love
Points = 2 points
opinion of the poem and author = DONT GET THE CLEAR PICTURE OF THIS POEM. I DIDNT CAPTURE ME AND IT WAS TOO LONG.
name = Lisa Ferrer
Poem_author = There is an ocean between us by Natalie Justice
Points = 5 points
opinion of the poem and author = This is a beautiful poem, I could actually feel
her love and longing for this man. Very emotional.
Good Job!!!!!!!!!
name = christie walters
Poem_author = Despair by Sherrie Knapp
Points = 5 points
opinion of the poem and author = it is a real tear jerker and sherri knows what she is feeling and other people are gonna feel this too it was truly a great work of poetry
name = Linda Dousay
Submission_author = The Unwanteds by Nathan Black
Points = 3 points
opinion of the submission and author = Cute, and well written.
name = don
Narrative_author = Hail The Mighty God Cyber by Megan Love
Points = 4 points
opinion of the narrative and author = Em turns them out consistently.
name = GAYLE THOMPSON
Poem_author = Awakening by Nicole M. Brand
Points = 3 points
opinion of the poem and author = It was a nice poem about losing true love.
name = em
Poem_author = Pan's Pleasure by Tommy
Points = 4 points
opinion of the poem and author = Pan does it again... Well done Tommy...
name = Ken Bushnell
Narrative_author = Oh, Christmas Tree by Bob Schackner
Points = 4 points
opinion of the narrative and author = I had a blast reading this. An enjoyable little piece of Americana spiced with experiences, details, and repartee.
name = Ken Bushnell
Story_author = The Right Thing by Suzanne Tetreault
Points = 4 points
opinion of the story and author = Nice story. I see a wonderfully built palette just waiting for a splash of color. For some reason it brought to mind a story by Joyce Carol Oates (I apologize for not remembering the title - all of her stuff is good) describing a delinquent friend. I wonder if you have the same rhythm?
name = Ken Bushnell
Submission_author = Why Should I Learn This by Elen Turner
Points = 5 points
opinion of the submission and author = Remarkable thought processes. I'm glad I'm not your teacher. It seems like your writing has a very strong mechanical structure, in this article, as well.
name = Ken Bushnell
Story_author = Hot Flash by Lorna Bath
Points = 5 points
opinion of the story and author = News Flash! You seem to be in the prime of your writing. There's some pretty incredible analogies, descriptions, what have you, in this short piece.
name = Ken Bushnell
Narrative_author = Hail The Mighty God Cyber by Megan Love
Points = 5 points
opinion of the narrative and author = Wow! I don't know if you're a sage or a libertarian. Definitely a brilliant piece. Leading edge stuff. The style has a stabbing directness. The meaning ... well I'm gonna have to read it a couple of more times.
name = Elen Turner
Narrative_author = America The Loser by Fred Lane
Points = 5 points
opinion of the narrative and author = I like this piece of writing. As someone not from America it is good to
see that someone who is American has the integrity to realise what the
country really has turned into. 5 points.
name = Lorie Haussy
Narrative_author = It's Not Just About Me Anymore by Khyla
Points = 4 points
opinion of the narrative and author = I felt that she was coming to another side of herself that she'd only dreamed of before. I could feel the power in her words
name = Pam Marquardt
Narrative_author = It's Not Just About Me Anymore by Khyla
Points = 4 points
opinion of the narrative and author = I know EXACTLY where Khyla is coming from, I have been there forever. I also attended a convention and like her, felt like I was home.
name = Trudi
Narrative_author = It's Not Just About Me Anymore by Khyla
Points = 5 points
opinion of the narrative and author = I agree with everything Khyla said in her writing and me being a fellow ssbbw, I am finally glad to see someone encourge today's society about the fat people.
name = Jack Mann
Narrative_author = The Fine Art Of Home Improvement by Patti Dinneen
Points = 5 points
opinion of the narrative and author = Very well written! Sometimes it is cheaper to hire someone that knows what they are doing. I think every one has been there, only the men won't admit it. LOL
name = Christine
Narrative_author = It's Not Just About Me Anymore by Khyla
Points = 5 points
opinion of the narrative and author = I have experienced this very same type of empowering and uplifting situation. As a member of NAAFA (NAAF) I have learned so many thing. The most important being that fat people deserve to live free of discrimination. On May 6th we celebrate International No diet Day in rememberance of all those who have died through dieting and eating disorders. 6 year olds should not be looking at themselves thinking they need to diet. This is exactly what they are doing and the rates of anorexia and bulimia are increasing. This is why I believe this is an important narrative to read because it shows that fat people can be happy. And yes there are actually men who prefer larger women just as there are men who prefer blonds.
name = Beth
Narrative_author = It's Not Just About Me Anymore by Khyla
Points = 5 points
opinion of the narrative and author = WONDERFULLY written and every so true....time for the world to realize fat people won't go away. Thank you for putting that into words.
name = Donna Ryan
Narrative_author = It's Not Just About Me Anymore by Khyla
Points = 5 points
opinion of the narrative and author = I knew that the trip to Chicago was special to Khyla, but I had no idea it had changed her life and her outlook like this! Makes me feel warm and fuzzy! I wish that more fat women and men knew about the love and acceptance that IS out there. We must love OURSELVES first. Khyla's got it!
name = Tyler
Story_author = Sam Schpade - Private Detective by Gary Gordon
Points = 5 points
opinion of the story and author = The story? Excellent! Well written and a classic parody if there ever was one.
The author? A soon-to-be best-selling writer.
name = Duane Locke
Column_author = Blue Reincarnation by Yustas Kotz-Gottlieb
Points = 5 points
opinion of the column and author =
I cherish your article. I have seen the
oil painting so what I have to said is in response to communication.
I've always been fascinated by the Narcissus legend and have used it in my poems.
I transform the legend to mean that Narcissus looks at his beauty and is sad, for true
beauty has no meaning in this world. I mean the beauty of the artists. Only false beauty
is celebrated, for the people are blind to true beauty.
Narcissus sees that true beauty is useless, will only be polluted, in a society that lives by
lies and reveres whatever is cheap, commonplace, ugly, and vulgar.
I always sensed that all ordinary love and the love sanctioned by our society is
autoeroticism. When a person hugs another he hugs himself. The two great evils in the
world are the virign and the libertine, or to put in modern terms, the nun and Playboy
magazines. For extraordinary, one must unlearn all the lies society has spoken above
love, and be able to commune with the other, something different than himself.
Thanks for the essay,
name = M.B.
Story_author = Sam Schpade - Private Detective by Gary Gordon
Points = 5 points
opinion of the story and author = Baaaaaa-Haaaaa Ha Ha Ha Haaaaaaa!
PLEASE post some more stuff like this!
name = M.B.
Story_author = Barney's Market by Ken Bushnell
Points = 5 points
opinion of the story and author = As usual, another great one from Ken. I think "Mole Exterminator" is still my favorite though.
name = em
Narrative_author = It's Not Just About Me Anymore by Khyla
Points = 5 points
opinion of the narrative and author = It takes courage to speak out, when society dictates you are different... stories like this show that it truly is better to see first an individual worthy of care and kindness and labellin' is left 'til later... well done Mam...
name = Lynda Finn
Narrative_author = It's Not Just About Me Anymore by Khyla
Points = 4 points
opinion of the narrative and author = The story showed a keen sense of personal growth and freedom but began with, 'you may have noticed I'm a fat girl' - how? There was no picture and in view of the theme of the story, it would be nice if the author had set the scene about how marginalised fat people are, how badly they are treated by the world - before telling us how liberated she felt by meeting with people like herself.
Otherwise I found it extremely uplifting. I brought home quite clearly how sick our society is when we can castigate a whole bunch of people for the way they look. Has this replaced racism? If so, it should be stopped.
name = GAYLE THOMPSON
Poem_author = Despair by Sherrie Knapp
Points = 3 points
opinion of the poem and author = WAS A GOOD POEM. GOT A LITTLE LOST IN THE BEGINNING BUT THE MIDDLE AND END ARE REALLY GOOD. I CAN IDENTIFY WITH THE REST OF THE POEM.
name = GAYLE THOMPSON
Submission_author = The Roll by R.L. Walker
Points = 4 points
opinion of the poem and author = I REALLY LIKE THIS POEM. IT IS CUTE AND WELL WRITTEN. I WILL LOOK AT MY TOLIET PAPER IN A DIFFERENT WAY. HE IS RIGHT WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE AS LONG AS IT IS THERE!
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