Question & Answer with the Alien, Sizzling Saucer Lady
Updated: October 02, 2003
Sizzling Saucer Lady answers the questions asked by visitors at the OSSLR site. Get the whole alien low-down from the extraterrestrial herself.
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Question Number 10 |
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On October 02, 2003, A Forth Anonymous Visitor, who I'll refer to as GP, got very cheeky with this question:
Are you Libby SSL?(lol)
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Dear GP,
I have never been associated with the Libby SSL Alien Clan. They are thought to be unkept and unclean yet great tinkers and singers. If you are ever lucky enough to encounter a Libby SSL alien clone, feed it raisins instead of popcorn.
Sincerely,
Sizzling Saucer Lady
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Question Number 9 |
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On March 24, 2003, A Third Anonymous Visitor asked the question on everyone's frightened tongues:
are yuou a bitch [sic]
No. Nope. Of course not. Are you?
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| Question Number 8 |
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On March 03, 2003, Another Anonymous Visitor asked the alien the following straight to the point question:
Why bother?
Why bother, indeed! I suppose one could counter that question with "Why ever not?" or "Is it really a bother?" However, that would be unfair to the questioneer.
One should bother because where would the challenge in life be if we all did things that didn't bother us, eh? If you don't bother, you are therefore giving up on life.
Sincerely,
Sizzling Saucer Lady
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| Question Number 7 |
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Hi Saucer Lady, How are you??? So I just checked out your site and I think I have a sighting to report. I think I saw Sizzling drinking a Corona in my kitchen on Friday February 14 aroung 22 hundred hours. Let me know if that was you??????
Mastering the Grill,
Lord of the Barbeque
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Dear Food Vandal:
I am fine. Thank you for asking. No that was not me but my evil (non-related) alien twin, Satanic Space Lizard. This fake has been making personal and public appearances posing as moi. As of late, due to an embarrassing rash, I do not make appearances. My 'twin' is using this to her advantage to spread her evil on Earth by taking my place at planned and unplanned events. If you do come across a reptilian alien, keep all personal information to yourself. The reptilian aliens will use it to make a replacement of you (lizard in a human suit) and destroy you, the original. These saurian extraterrestrials have a dilatory strategy to take over Earth and therefore dangerous ... run for your lives.
Sincerely,
Sizzling Saucer Lady
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| Question Number 6 |
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Dear SSL,
I recently became the proud owner of a pair of red/blue stereo anaglyph viewing glasses, of the type used for viewing 1950s 3D films like House of Wax and Bwana Devil. (Although mine have stylish spongy triceratops frames, unlike the cheap, unattractive ones used to view those films.) Well, guess what? Your site is not stereo blue/red anaglyph viewer friendly *at all.*
In fact, some of the text is only visible with one eye, leading to dizziness and disorientation on my part. Is there some reason you are making your site difficult for the wearers of these glasses? We have feelings too, and we do not like to be excluded.
Thank you for your time,
Rev. Prof. Coyote
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Dear fuzzy pious pedagogue:
Your need to use outdated human technology baffles me along with your need to use this technology to view my on-line fan site. I assume this means you distrust the site and me. I do not know how you came to this doubt in our sincerety, but I say, "For shame!" A self-professed leader such as yourself may not last very long if you keep this up. Your selfishness seems to know no limits. I suggest you look at your own site with your 3D Glasses and see if you have the same or even worse vision problems. And do so before you damn the OSSLR with more of your stupidity.
Sincerely,
Sizzling Saucer Lady
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Dear Visitors, Using alternative technologies to view the OSSLR on-line is not recomended unless otherwise stated.
Synthetically yours, the Cyber-Dowager of the OSSLR (otherwise known as the Webmistress of the Official Shrouded Skulls Lament Report)
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| Question Number 5 |
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On November 11, 2002, an Anonymous Visitor to the OSSLR made a bold made a statement while visiting the Alien Movie Reviews Page and Sizzling Saucer Lady was kind enough to comment on it:
"I'm an Alien picko"
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Dear visitor,
I have never heard of "An Alien Picko" before. I thought I knew of all Alien Races in the Universe. So after a 2 minute internet search, I hypothesized that you are either a Germanic Alien or the alien representation for the "Private Infrastructure Investment Center of Korea" that uses PICKO as its Acronym. Nonetheless, I really don't care who or what you are. Your menacing statement makes you an enemy. Furthermore, you will be destroyed if you ever come within a solar system of me or the OSSLR again. Have a nice day.
Sincerely,
Sizz
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| Question Number 4 |
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On May 01, 2002, yuricky80 ask two (2) questions regarding something that may not have made it onto the post, and SSL answered on July 11, 2002:
...which metals and minerals are in sufficient amounts on the US territory? Which metals need to be imported by US and which countries are supplying them?
Dear yuricky,
Ummmm...Could you repeat that? .. oh nevermind .. The only important metals are 1st 2nd & 3rd place in the Annual Galactic UFO Saucer Races. I placed 4th last year and I hope to place in the top three next year. Oh wait, those are medals. I blame the confussion on your complex human language that is not logical for logical aliens such as I. Anyhow, I must return to your question. .. hmmmmm .............
Sincerely,
Sizz
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| Question Number 3 |
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Gliese876 asked two (2) very important questions on February 26, 2002:
1. Can you explain all the hype about Duck Matter?
2. Why is this so important?
Dear Gli,
I have thought long and hard about how to answer your question. First, let me explain "Duck Matter":
"Duck Matter" refers to the amount of a certain residual duck substance whose existence is deduced from the analysis of pond and lake muck but which until now, has escaped all detections. There are many theories on what duck matter could be. Not one, at the moment is convincing enough and the question is still a mystery.
Explaination of "the hype" about Duck Matter:
Ducks need other non-duck Earthlings to be concerned about them. They have created a mystery to boggle minds and confuse the weak.
In regards to why it is so important, I only have this answer:
Importance is irrelevant. Mysteries are a fact of life. Without a mystery here and there, especially about Ducks, Earth would be a tiresome place. If that were the case, then I would searching for a new planet to take up residence.
I, Sizzling Saucer Lady, thank you for your questions, Earthling.
Sincerely,
Sizz
P.S. Dark Matter is a whole other ball of wax.
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| Question Number 3 |
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Meskiagkasher asked on December 29, 2001:
Dear SSL,
Who supplies the furniture for your flying saucer? Do you need a new couch?
Mesk
Dear Mesk,
I've spent many hours, days, weeks, months, years searching through flea markets trying to locate the replacement flying saucer parts that burned up on touch down. Furniture has been the least of my worries. Despite all that I've checked out your Used Couch Emporium. While the Incendiary Couch seems like a bad bad idea, if you could give me a good deal-no, a great deal-on a non-flamable couch/sofa, contact me immediately. My rump could used the rest and comfort.
Sincerely,
Sizz
The House of Mesk is home to Mesk's Used Couch Emporium.
Once inside the house, click on the couch and find all your couching needs.
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| Question Number 2 |
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A_Clockwork_Coyote asked on July 20, 2001:
Dear SSL,
I downloaded your website, and changed the extension names of all text files from .html to .mpg, so that I could view your site as a cool, psychedelic, hippie rock and roll video in my media player. It didn't work. What did you do wrong, and when are you going to fix it?
Sincerely (like hell!)
Coyote
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Dear fuzzy Earthling with sharp teeth,
I fail to see why I must give you an answer regarding the website and how it works, but since you took the time to ask I will answer.
The site works as is. Downloading the site to watch it as a video? I don't know what put that into your canine head. I have seen your tiny miniscule humorless site, and it is obvious to me that website design goes over your head.
HOWEVER, the idea of have a cool, psychedelic, hippie rock and roll video of "Retired Aliens Playing the Board Game Othello" makes for an interesting idea, don't cha think?
So I hope that answers your question(s).
Sincerely,
Sizz
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| Question Number 1 |
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Ridiculese asked on April 17, 2001:
Are you sizzling or is your saucer sizzling? If it's you, is it one of your species traits, or are you that good looking?
Earthling you try my patience. I am sizzling. The saucer is sizzling. It is just an all around wacky sizzling shread fest!!! The *sizzling* was a gift from the planet earth. As I explained to Awwa, it has something to do with reentry into the earth's atmosphere. |
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The Far Side® copyright ©TheFarWorks,Inc. (used without permission & downloaded from Alien GIF Centre)
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