Back in the day...the olden days of TV, when Monty Python had a show, they had this recurring thing where a dude in a suit of armor would walk up to someone acting like an idiot and hit him in the head with a big, dead, raw chicken. Man, I wish that guy was still around.

Like tonight. I was at the batting cages and had to put up with this jerk. First of all, dude steals my parking space...you know...when you see someone getting ready to leave so you're waiting for it, and some jerk pulls in before you. Well, this assfather in a big gas guzzling, air polluting truck pulls in and he and this kid get out. Fine. Karma will smite him down some day.

So I find another spot, park, go in and walk into the area with the cages...and there's assfather with assson. AF is chatting away, his shrill voice going a mile a minute, talking about some kind of baseball junk, but it's obvious dude got his skills from a video. The cage I use is on the other end so I go there and can still hear Assfather...he hasn't stopped talking to this poor assson.

As I'm hitting (hitting pretty well, I might add) the Asses come to use the cage next to me...I swear, Assfather doesn't shut up the entire time. Let the damn kid hit in peace! It's supposed to be a freakin game you hole! Assfather talked while the kid hit, in between tokens, when they switched cages, even as they were walking out the door. I hope the kid takes up curling. That'll show him. Parking-space-stealing-not-shutting-up-thinking-you-know-more-than-you-do-about-baseball-Assfather.

I should've called Child Protective Services on him.