To try to explain the thought process that got me to this self-observation would ruin the moment, so I won't bother. But I'm ready to reveal a couple of things. The first is a "duh" kind of thing...the other is a bit more disturbing.

I've been trying to post a demo of the new song Big Balloon Head for a few days now. At first I was having trouble getting the guitar down. Too fast, too slow, muted strings...eventually I realized that it's just a demo so I shouldn't worry about it. Then the vocals. Man, I was struggling. Then I realized...

Hey dumbass, you can't sing.

Oh yeah...I forgot about that. For a minute I actually thought I was a musician. And I haven't even been drinking. So no demo for now. I've got a session with Robert on Tuesday. We'll see if this can get ironed out.

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There's just too many things happening all at once to explain how this realization hit me. When it comes to sexual...uh...proclivities, pretty much at the top of my list is sound. There really is nothing like the sound of a woman's voice (this is a generalization of course - there are exceptions). Even in music I listen to...I prefer female vocals over male.

Now if this female voice is saying something hot...well, that's pretty much all I need. From this, I think the hottest thing I've ever heard was Lauren Graham in the movie Bad Santa:

"Fuck me Santa, Fuck me Santa, Fuck me Santa, Fuck me Santa, Fuck me Santa"

I really don't know what this means. Probably that I need help. My friends know how much Christmas annoys me.

Ho! Ho! Ho! I guess.