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Saturday, September 16 I passed the Idaho bar! Woo hoo!! I've had to look at my name on the list a few times to make sure it's real, and then it seems maybe that isn't my name. I guess it's just a bit different than California. So my mom will be coming out in two weeks to go to the admission/swearing-in ceremony in Boise. I've been on eBay looking for a maternity dress or outfit I can wear. I'll be going to a practical skills course the next day down there, too, so I'll have to get something to wear to that. Then I guess it's time to find a job or something. I may have to call the attorney I talked to when we moved here - the only one listed under adoptions in the phone book. She didn't want any help then, but maybe being admitted will help. Or I'll just have to figure out how to start getting my own business. John thinks I should just do real estate transactions. If I could do one or two adoptions and one or two closings each month, I would think that would be enough work and income for me. We'll see. I can't believe I'm also 31 weeks pregnant and having biweekly midwife appointments. It's going ot be here before I know it. OK, she's going to be here before I know it. Three kids. What am I going to do? I'm assuming I'll never leave the house. John should just let me go to Starbuck's everyday now because there's no way it's going to happen with three of them to drag with me. I've been having a lot of crying spells lately and I'm not sure if it's knowing what's in store in two months (sleepless nights, another little person attached to me, stuck in the house) or the extra estrogen. Sunday morning seems to be the most frequent time. Maybe I should plan to get out of here early tomorrow morning and hit Starbuck's or something. My mom's in Paris this weekend. I hope she has a good time. Yes, she's with her estranged husband, but it seems like they've been getting along pretty well since he's moved out. Sunday, September 24 (32 weeks) Maternity dresses are awful. I cannot believe how huge I look in these things. I bought 5 maternity dresses on eBay for the swearing-in ceremony this week and I can't decide which one looks the least horrible. What do you think? Big Dresses My mom decided against coming, so it will just be the happy family unit. I talked John into going down the day before and driving back Friday after the practical skills seminar I have to do. Kids aren't supposed to go to the ceremony, but I found out there will be a room for restless little ones with a TV showing the ceremony. We really don't have a choice. I sold candles at the farmers' market yesterday and did pretty well. I would like to do it again next weekend, but am short on some supplies and may not be able to get stuff before we have to leave Wednesday. I did better than I have done at any craft show. I really want to go back to be consistent, but I'm also having problems with my wax and wick size. This new palm wax is a lot harder than the stuff I bought in Illinois and I'm using the thickest wick I can get in my molds. Whatever. We started putting John and Max in their own beds a few nights ago. Max had a diaper leak the first night that woke him up, but he stayed in there the whole night the second night. He didn't make a sound. Of course John woke up and cried each night. He woke up Max last night at only 11:45 pm. So we were all back in the same big bed again. It feels kinda weird going to sleep by ourselves. It's one of those things that makes me feel like an adult. I'm not sure what I'm going to do after becoming a real attorney this week. I've drafted a letter to send to the one adoption attorney in town. I guess I could just send letters to all the firms in town. Finding a part-time job would be perfect. If I could have the same schedule I had when I was studying, it would be great. And I think I'm starting a Bradley class this week with two couples. Oooh. Two couples. I won't hold my breath, though. It really makes me nervous and gets me stressed thinking about it for some reason. The house is a mess and I don't know how much cleaning I will be able to do. This big belly is really weighing me down lately. I can't believe we only have 8 weeks to go. I'm getting really worn out by the end of the day and just don't have much energy. Making candles last week was tough. I don't think John understands at all. He rolls his eyes or makes little heavy sigh noises when I ask him to get me something. I think he was more sympathetic during the first two pregnancies. I wish there was a way for him to feel what it's like to have a little person living and growing inside him, depending on him for blood and oxygen and nutrients. It's not easy gaining 30 pounds so quickly, having something punching and kicking your guts. The heartburn has been bad this time. I have been biting the Tums in half when I need them, trying not to take too much. I don't know if I'll be able to go through this again. I thought exercising would help keep my energy up and lessen some of the physical side effects, but I'm not sure it is. I've been going to yoga Tuesdays and Thursdays and walking on a treadmill Monday, Wednesday and Friday. I hate to think how I would feel if I wasn't doing anything. |
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