by Steve Maxon

Let's take a look into the ol' mailbag tonight.

"We need more, Man."
"What on earth does this mean?  Could you put it in English please?"
"Even knowing the ending, does not lessen the tension it places on my emotions, as I read down through this exciting serial."
"If I only had a cross-over..."
"Where did you get these....weird...."
"Great stuff! I love the drama.  Let me know how it turns out or I'll send you a virus that will effect more than your dongle."
"THAT baffles me!"
"I know I won't be calling mommie every chance I get!!!"

Okay, maybe that was a bad idea.  Where was I?  Ah yes.  Chris Moisio, fresh off the denial of a choice room in the basement, was forced to select another room, on a less prime grade A floor.

To make a boring part of the story short, there were a few freshman rooms available on the 1st floor.  He picked the one he wanted, I picked the one I wanted: we were both relatively happy.  Close enough to the basement to go down and party, but we had showers separate from the urinals.

I know what you're thinking about my last sentence.  And the answer is no, pig.

The room draw had finally come to an end, and a disappointed young Steve Maxon ascended the stairs to the 3rd floor.  Upon entering the lounge, I found what looked to be a suicidally angry Gary sitting alone in a dark room watching "Cosby."  "This is the episode when he joins a gay softball team, but doesn't know it," Gary said.  "I know," I replied.  "I saw the previews."

From this ominous beginning sprang a conversation about his future.  "I don't even want to come back next year," he spat.  "I can't believe they did that to me!"  (Expletives - bowlderized as they were - deleted.)  I told him that it would be a tragic mistake if he abandoned school due to a complication with his roommate, and urged him to go see the RD.  He paid his $100; he shouldn't let a little thing like this get in the way of his future.  He left (at the end of "Cosby," of course; if you were wondering, Bill went to a party with Doug E. Doug and they figured out the whole gay thing) a little more optimistic, and decided that he would in fact see the RD and maybe get a random freshman or transfer to room with.

Postscript.

After a few days of complaining to everyone - especially me and Vreeland - and avoiding all conversation with Gregg and Jeremy, Gary went back to his semi-normal, if moody, self.  He and Tom have decided they will room together next year, creating the potential for, and I quote myself, "THE WORST-SMELLING ROOM IN AMERICA!"

Gregg and Jeremy got off much better than they probably should have, following their thoughtless trick.  Gary still has a few months to carry out his "coffin" threat, however.

My story was not told in this series, but I'm rooming with Josh Jones, who is losing his current roommate, Hubie, to a probable transfer.

Dave - my current roommate - hopes to commute from his sister's house nearby.

The reason this comes a few hours after my last one is because we left to play basketball right after I started.  I did great, if you must know, and because of that, I may now have an intramural team to play on next year.  Who knows?  We still lost, though,
45-39.

There are 10,000 different varieties of potatoes in the world.

THE END . . .

Another Postscript

NHS Speech

"My View" Editorial

The October Surprise
|  Round 1 |  2  |  3  |  4  |  5  |
|   6  |  7  |  8  |  9  |  10  |
|  11  |  12  |  Final Bell  |

Journey to Jersey II
|  Intro  |  1  |  2  |  3  |  4  |  5  |
|   6  |  7  |  8  |  9  |  10  |  11  |
|  12  |  13  |  14  |  15  |

Journey to Jersey I
|  1  |  2  |  3  |  4  |  5  |   6  |  7  |  8  |
|  9  |  10  |  11  |  12  |  13  |  14  |
|  15  |  16  |  17  |  18  |  19  |  20  |

An Epic Saga
|  Act  1  |  2  |  3  |  4  |  5  |
|   6  |  7  |  8  |  9  |  10  |  11  |
|  12  |  13  |  14  |  15  |  16  |

Christian Rock Email

Freshman Room Draw
|  Part One  |  Two  |
|  Three  |  Four  |  Five  |