Once upon a time there was a popular, young, spunky, boy-band musician type named Shannon Parker Knowles. One day, whilst traveling through the Mekong Delta in a little blue bus with his good friend Philip Poosis, he met the love of his life, Lisa Chicken-Curry Kenny.
Lisa Chicken-Curry Kenny, a prominent sporty type lady, was in Vietnam for a swimming competition at the time. The press that were in Vietnam to cover the swimming competition decided that a celebrity romance was infinitely more interesting than people splashing around in tub of water and decided to devote most of their time publicising the couple's whirlwind romance.
When it came Lisa Chicken-Curry Kenny's time to swim, there was Shannon Parker Knowles, up in the stands, cheering on his new lady friend. Unfortunately, Lisa Chicken-Curry Kenny finished just short of the semi-finals.
The press, being a bunch of particularly intuitive types, decided that Lisa Chicken-Curry Kenny's romance with Shannon Parker Knowles was to blame for her failure to win her races. They proceeded to say as much in their various reports, thus portraying their relationship as a scandal that had robbed Lisa Chicken-Curry Kenny, and therefore Australia, of a gold medal.
When questioned about this Lisa Chicken-Curry Kenny replied, "How in the f**king f**k is my relationship and my swimming ability affecting you c**ts?! If you think you can do any better, have a friggin go, you pricks!"
Then Shannon Parker Knowles grabbed the microphone from the reporter and crooned, "What about us? It isn't fair! We've had enough and we want our share! Can't you see? We want to live! You just take more than you give!"
The press didn't particularly care, however, and proceeded to report on Shannon Parker Knowles and Lisa Chicken-Curry Kenny throwing a hissy fit. Such time was devoted to the hissy fit incident that newspapers and news broadcasts around the world had to bump the news of Bachelor Bob Guiney's music career yet again, and he got absolutely no publicity at all.
Poor Bob Guiney.
The End.
You can email the Gold Logie winning Stilt-boy at jimjimbo75@yahoo.com.au
Go ahead, ask him a question... or offer him sexual favors, he'd like that...
