20:57EST-MON-7/29/2002
- Well... Today was interesting. It started off fine this morning with a steady nothing to do at work. I decided to go goof off while on a delivery (shhhhh!!!!) and went to go visit my friends at Accuracy International. My plan was to go and just buy a scope rail (one hundred dollars of luv) but I was denied. Apparently Tobias is a psychic and knew that I would be coming so he sent them all out to be painted. Curses! He then informed me that the Wonder Stock that I've been waiting on is in a truck from Atlanta as the shipment finally made it over from England and should be in tomorrow. Woohoo! I was juiced. I was so happy that I didn't think anything could tear the smile from my face. That is... Until I read my mail and realized I had a huge ebony cock in my ass being rowdy. It was basically just a letter from the IRS saying 'It has come to our attention that we sent you some money and want it back.' I was depressed about that. They wanted three times the ammount of cash I can scrounge up. There goes the good news about my stock. It also dashed a get-rich-quick idea I had that involved my latest goldmine stock pick. Stock market scandals are a potential investor's dream. I needed to be cheered up. I have found that the best things to cure depressions are sex and shopping. Since I didn't have a chance at the former, I opted for plan B. I went to Guncraft Sports with $253 and left with $2.42 and a smile. Now all I need is a little bit of time, a little bit of space, and a box of bullets before I can start cranking out my own ammo. The advantage of reloading is that you are taking various components and making your very own custom cartriges. I could name it whatever I wanted since it'd be my own creation. I haven't decided what I will be naming the various handgun cartriges I'll be making but if I ever make my own shotgun rounds, I'll have to call it 'L33T SK33T.
10:08EST-MON-7/29/2002
- Heh heh heh, last night my mind was torturing me with random thoughts while I tried to coax it into slumber after two bottles of glorious Dr. Pepper. One of the lines of thought included Star Wars. More specifically, the people who have been standing out front of the theatre for weeks on end just for tickets. (Fandango!) Just think about them all standing around waiting for the release date while dressed up in their Star Wars costumes chanting fervently. Now imagine that the next Star Trek movie was opening on the same night and at the same theatre as the next Star Wars movie. The two fanatical crowds would probably start a small clan war right there. Imagine how their lives would crumble into meaninglessness if George Lucas and Gene Rodenberry died in a plane accident.
22:42EST-SUN-7/28/2002
- Dammit! I am missing a link that I was trying to find for Dave. I'm sure you'll know the one I'm talking about. It starts off with a simple page and blares something about gay porn as loud as it can. Then it starts opening an infinite number of pop-ups of goatse. Very violent website and destructive to your mentality. I luv ya Dave, but you asked what it was.
17:45EST-SUN-7/28/2002
- Does it get any better???
0:34EST-SUN-7/28/2002
- The passion of driving returned to me with a vengeance today. The squeal of tires trying desperately to keep their grip during a high speed turn is music to my ears. Every G a gentle massage. The smooth steering wheel spinning to correct itself as I let it slide through my grip is like running my hand across the gentle curve of hips. The rigid embrace of the seat belt as it locks to keep me in my seat as I counter steer for the next turn is like a firm hug from a lover. The chirp of the tires and whine of the engine as I down shift is like a sigh during a stretch. As I climb out of the low seat I cannot suppress the smile that conquers my face as I allow myself to acknowledge the adrenaline rush. I want to be a stunt driver. Maybe LaMans. On a completely separate note, I feel like sharing the dog porn story from earlier this week. Several of us (Zak, Steve, Phil, and I) met at Magic Wok and were happily eating our Spicy Death Goodness in the back room. As conversations are prone to do, it drifted briefly to porn. Any conversation with geeks involving porn is bound to eventually involve Consumption Junction. The same geeks are likely to mention goatse.cx and this was no exception. Phil was telling us about the latest shocker that Joel had forced him to watch. This one happened to involve a woman and a dog. Unfortunately, his attention to detail was not missed on us as he told the story at great length. Suddenly, I had a horrible thought and decided to share the pain with the others. Canine DVDA. If you don't know what DVDA means, you are either really young or really naive. Ask Jeeves. Anyway, I laid out the mental image for the others.
One woman... four dogs.
When their faces were on the verge of implosion from disgust, I made it worse.
One dog... four guys.
That pushed it over the edge of disgust and right into the realm of dark comedy. We all laughed (comedy is all about impossibilities) and then the conversation turned to what breeds of dog would be best suited for the above task. By the time we started considering the venerable basset hound, general consensus was that it was definitely time to leave. Another day, another three victims of knowing me. On that note, I would like to point out that many people censor their journals because they feel their own thoughts are private or that they think if people really knew what they thought about then people would think less of them. I think that's all bullshit. There are basically only two purposes of an online journal. One is to express yourself to the world. To let them know who you truly are and allow people to get a further insight to your innermost self. To some of us that is important. We seek understanding. Others have a journal that they censor heavily or alter completely. At this point I would like to point out that both my mother and father both read this journal. Heh heh heh... dog porn. LOL!
2:20EST-SAT-7/27/2002
- Have you ever had a day that just started on the wrong foot and it makes you snappy? I was forcibly snatched from a peaceful slumber by 8 calls to my cell-phone from someone at work. I eventually answered (expecting news like the place had burned down an everyone gets a free box of cheese sticks) but it was just a co-worker begging me to come in early so he could go out of town. I eventually agreed and spent the next three hours talking online with friends. That part was groovy. I enjoyed tinkering with my new webcam quite a bit and got to use many of the more disturbing things I have laying about my computer desk (like the inflatable sex sheep) in attempts to get a laugh. AIM does not support this capability but Yahoo messenger does, plus a few other nifty things. For years my major gripe with YIM (Yahoo Instant Messenger) was that I didn't know as many people on it as I do on AIM (about 125 people) so I tended to not bother with it. A friend of mine from Atlanta convinced me to give it another try since she and I could use the webcams. She's cute so I buckled. Along the way I noticed that they have IMVironments. Some are cheesy and others seem pretty neat. I'll have to look into the various options more. The one she showed me was called Last Shot or something and featured a couple of characters from what looks like a very dramatic gothic-western style. Wicked grins, big hair, dark clothing, and plenty of shots which allowed me to make trouser commentary. That alone made it worthwhile because you know how well I like saying trousers!
0:16EST-FRI-7/26/2002
- Whew! Ok, Gun Day was stellar. Phil and I got to teach Daria about the joys of the gun. She didn't seem like she had much fun there at first. I think this is because of the way in which she was taught. I've had 100% success with the way I teach my courses by starting with the smallest rifle I have and working them up in form and technique until they are using the largest rifles of my collection. Depending on how well they did with the rifles, I may let the person(s) use a pistol. While I was still setting my stuff up, Phil jumped right in and started teaching her how to use a Glock 9mm handgun. Sigh... Too many cooks really does spoil the broth. She seemed to enjoy the 10/22 rifle better than anything else and I can't blame her. 10/22 rifles are the best thing since we discovered fire, the wheel, and broadband networks. She emailed me and said that once she stopped shaking some hours later that she realized she actually had fun. I remembered to take my digital camera with me this time and got a few pictures. I've posted them on the JA website so if you know what I'm talking about then you are in luck. Fair warning though - After we left the range Zak took us to his sister's house to play in their heated swimming pool and watch Eddie Izzard videos. That was lots of fun as well and I have some pics of two very white pudgy guys in shorts for your viewing pleasure. Holly may be unlovable (I have that on good authority too) but she should have been there to help us make fun of each other. I can think of a number of people who I would have enjoyed being there but few take such an active part in the trash talking. After a full day of shooting, sweating, and swimming, my bed welcomed me for the sleep of the dead. I was supposed to go to a meeting for work this morning and had set my pager to wake me up. The process of setting the alarm requires many key combinations be pressed to access and navigate the menus before you can modify the settings but somehow I managed to reset it while still asleep and missed the whole thing. I hope I don't catch hell for it. I was actually kind of looking forward to dressing in my civilian clothes to a work meeting and being disruptive. Oh well. I met up with my father AND HAD SOUP K! Then we spent the day at the range where he played with his Llama .32 pistol, .36 black powder revolver and .50 black powder rifle with a VERY slick two stage trigger that puts anything I own to shame. I only used my USP and 10/22. I blew through about 200 rounds and he did something like 20 between the three of his guns. One clip through his .32 auto and all the rest was black powder. He taught me how to use his toys and I will admit that it was fun. I may be a modern firearm elitest but fun is fun, even if it is very time consuming. Heh, we spent the entire day on the plinking range. We took four two litre bottles that were filled with water and set out at fifty feet (or so) and some smaller 20oz bottles at the end of the field. I used almost an entire box of .45 ammo picking on one of the two litres. Standard UMC FMJ ball ammo does not do much damage, even in .45 calibre. The bottle had several holes in it and a couple of gashes from hydrostatic shock. Probably from the first round that hit. After the bottle has a couple of holes for the air and water to escape from, the pressure from the impact is less likely to cause a shockwave which can rend the bottle in Hollywoodesque style. Hollow point bullets make very satisfying splashes but cost more than I personally believe they are worth for simple plinking. The smaller the bullet, the more subtle the damage. I put two clips worth of .22 ammo into one of the two litre bottles and the only way you could tell was that it would start leaking. Imagine my surprise and the shit-eating grin on my father's face when one of the bottles erupted in a violent gyser of water and plastic as a .50 calibre home made lead cast semi-wadcutter bullet struck it. I should put some of the exploded remains on stakes in the front yard to ward off the hordes of water-filled two litre soda bottles that might be getting ideas of revolt.
22:28EST-TUE-7/23/2002
- Oh yeah! Tomorrow is Gun Day. W00t! We'll be breaking with tradition in that we will not be going to our favorite bar afterwards in search for obscure brews and calzone. Instead, Zak has proposed a better sounding option AND I'M NOT TELLING YOU WANKERS WHAT IT IS! Here's a hint though... It involves a swimming pool. Mmmmmm...
Nobody has responded to the emails I've sent out. How depressing. They don't know what they're missing!
Holly has gotten motivated about the whole Webmonkey Hub idea again. Since the Webmonkey Webring idea never really got the support it needed to work, I hope this one does better. Her ideas are good. In fact, I am going to quote some of her ideas here and give my feedback. It would probably be easier to just send her an email with it or send her a message on AIM, but I'm here now and HTML is more fun.
ME: Being the only girl monkey, mine would be pretty easy--hair and tits. I don't know enough about how others perceive me to suggest any more, so this will do for now.
Um, let's see now; Hair? Check... Tits? Check... Sounds good to me. Perhaps some form of writing utensil to help balance your character out seeing as how you get more and more accessory happy as you go down the list.
RHYS: Spike blue hair, of course, maybe some glowsticks. And a red plastic baseball bat (or should that be with Lucas? Or Shane? Who was it that broke Love on my ass? I can't remember.) <---Completely true, but very funny out-of-context comment.
I believe that would be Lucas who struck your posterior with LOVE to it's ultimate demise. As for Rhys, there has to be something on fire too. Never forget to associate Rhys with unexplained bursts of flames. It's just what he does.
JESSE: Plaid shirt, Vans, and some records. And a huge monkey-cock, duh.
We will have to make sure that whoever does the artwork can draw the difference between a tail and a ten foot ebony hued cock. Of doom. Or whatever the official title for his wang is now. The thought of a monkey wearing plaid is just funny. Maybe we can find suitable images if we watch enough of those monkey movies that TNT likes to play every so often.
SHANE: Leather jacket and a big gun. And maybe a peg leg.
A peg leg would be ok. A cybernetic leg would have more pinache. That would probably confuse people with some sort of cyborg mutant punk monkey. With a gun. It would be like a little simian Terminator.
CHUCK: Holding a MIDI keyboard and wearing headphones and a Dirty Dollar vest.
And a Star of David. And a Playgirl. And a blow up Antonio Banderas Luv Doll. And...
NICK: Fatigues, a few grenades at his belt, and a turban. And a bottle of rum. And an eyepatch.
I'm pretty sure that would exceed the accessory limit for most primates. If you cover the body with all that stuff, there will be almost nothing left exposed to reveal that it is, in fact, supposed to be a monkey. Maybe I'm too cynical and do not give people enough credit to be able to see a trend.
LUCAS: The biggest monkey. Has to look dumb--maybe scratching his head. Wearing a kilt.
If he's wearing a kilt, he must also have a sporin and a tammershanter.
3:33EST-TUE-7/23/2002
- I think DotNet is sick or something. She's been super-friendly for the past couple of days. Maybe she's just happy to have on a flea collar. Maybe she snuck out and got laid. Dunno. She still hates Phil though, but we do not blame her. I have been playing with her all night. For some reason she has been obcessed with laying on my gun bag. It is nothing more than a worn out old gym bag that I keep all my gun accessories in. Ammo, cleaning rods and cloths, solvent, lube, clips, replacement parts, various bits that at one time or another were useful but were relegated to the bag until further notice. There is no way that the bag could possibly be comfortable but we all know that cats rarely care what they are laying on as long as it is something you do not want them to be on. I have pushed/pulled/picked-up the cat thirty times tonight and last night trying to get her to relinquish her new throne but immediately goes right back to laying on the bag. If she was just running back to the bag and standing her ground daring me to move her again I could understand that but she just darts right for the bag and is instantly laying down and seemingly cozy again. For a reason I lack the ability to explain, I find this unusually funny. I wanted to see how many times I could push her off the bag before she gave up but after a while, my arm got tired and I gave up. She is laying on it right now watching TV. Freak.
2:42EST-TUE-7/23/2002
- WANTED: PUNK OR HEAVY METAL BAND TO COVER PETULA CLARK'S 'DOWNTOWN'. PLEASE SEE MANAGEMENT.
23:36EST-SUN-7/21/2002
- I got my key and spoony name tag! How exciting. I feel a rush of pride in being a member of the largest gun club in Tennessee. Not sure about other states, but twelve hundred members is nothing to sneeze at. Now the only thing that would make my day better would be to find a new episode of Sealab 2021. That, and a decent cover or remix of Petula Clark's 'Downtown'. The tune is so catchy that it can permanently scar someone's mind. Why hasn't anyone else had a field day with this yet? I can find enough versions of Elenor Rigby (one of my favorite songs of all time) to fill a 2 CD set, but that's not enough for me. My ideal cover of Downtown would be done in a punk or speed metal style but industrial would be interesting too. If someone made a gothic version of it, I would rupture a spleen laughing at the irony of it all. I think I'll finish downloading some more Dead Milkmen, Dead Kennedy's, and see what I can find from The Smiths before trying to collect everything done by Dead Can Dance again. All my tapes are missing and the two CDs I have are scratched beyond rehabilitation. I had 14 tapes so I can only imagine how much hard drive space and searching it'll take to rebuild that collection. Sigh... It's all the fault of Ron MacIntyre Fender for exposing them to me during Into the Darkness (disturbing show) and Christian Gunning for having a CD to let be borrow so that the hook would further sink itself into the leathery flesh of my musical taste.
Well... um... That was quite an odd way of putting it. I do'nt believe in erasing it so you'll have to suffer. I can't believe that Ron is going to be a monk!
12:49EST-SUN-7/21/2002
- Yay! Today I get my key and name tag to ORSA. Woo-hoo! I'm so excited. This means I'll be able to go shooting whenever I want. Spontaneous shooting fests whenever I feel the need to prove my dominant superiority over paper and tin cans. The meeting is in half an hour. Oh... I suppose I should go put on some trousers now.
2:42EST-SAT-7/20/2002
- Do you guys remember these little guys? I used to love those books when I was a kid.
1:40EST-SAT-7/20/2002
G-spot trivia!
Masturbation Home Page!
Worth a look, and nothing else
DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE!
Cooking With the Klingons
Submit and Click!
I haven't linked to this guy in a while...
Ain't it the truth?
References
And I just feel like bragging for a second... I HAVE THE ENTIRE FIRST SEASON OF ZIM! So, nyah! Send me your CDRs and a dollar if you wish to join the ranks of the Loser Elite.
15:46EST-FRI-7/19/2002
- Oh my god! The NRA has their own ISP. Just go to their web page and read about it. I support the NRA but I would have never suspected a move like that. Next thing you know, I'll be shopping at the NRA Grocery Store and Video Rental. Actually, the NRA video store would probably be really cool. That way I could probably find all the really good old black and white war movies with John Wayne and Ernest Borgnine in them that I used to love watching on AMC. Can you possibly think of a better place to find action films? Now I'm thinking about the NRA grocery store... Hmmm... Tacos...
15:44EST-FRI-7/19/2002
- I'm tired of hiding who I really am. I'm tired of pretending to be something I am not just for the sake of approval of my friends and family. The truth must be known. I must come clean. I know this will probably wind up hurting quite a bit but I must come out and say it! I like movies with Ernest P. Worrell in them. You know, movies like Ernest Goes to Camp. Hell, while I'm confessing my sins I might as well go all out. I even like Pauly Shore movies. And I like Carrot Top when he isn't doing long distance commercials. There. I have officially cast my stone into the still pond of the self-proclaimed Culturati. I imagine Jesse in particular will want to destroy me for my cinematic heresies... What? You didn't expect me to say I was gay did you?
15:15EST-FRI-7/19/2002
- Last night I went to see Jessica in the show at the Oak Ridge Playhouse. I really enjoyed it. Of course, it was preview night so everything wanted to go wrong. I smiled as I watched and realized that nothing had changed since my time there. Things were still the same after all and nothing will change the memories of all the fun I had there. Afterwards I took a trip to the Green Room to say "hi" to people and talked with Sandra Hererra for a few minutes. We talked about how much it had changed since I had been there and even more about all the changes she had seen come and go since she became involved 25 years ago. Truely fascinating stuff. On the stairs up to the stage I remember reading all the graffiti from years and years of actors and techies who wanted to leave their mark. I would become nostalgic and full of loss as I read some of the dates noticing how long some of those words and names had been there. Full of loss because their thoughts remained but they were long gone. This touches me even more today since I am now also one of the ones who has gone. I wonder if I left my mark on that stairwell back in those days too. That was literally in a previous life.
14:42EST-FRI-7/19/2002
- I realized this morning that I have been spending so much time these past couple weeks reading the other Ridgemonkey Webring's blogs that I have been neglecting mine. I don't think that is entirely a bad thing either. Still, I managed to complete my page about shooting for the time being. More updates will be added as my collection grows and if I can ever remember to take my digital camera with me. One of the two cardboard presentation stands that Lucas has brought home met it's maker at the hands of some 500 rounds of various calibre weaponry. It now resides in our kitchen and reminds us to clean. The other one will be shot at on the next Gun Day, I imagine. Lucas wanted to do it on a weekend but the range is usually a lot more packed on the weekends and I don't want people to get the wrong idea. If it was a stand-up of someone like Carrot Top, I do not think there would be any problems. All I know is that the guys name is Ozzie something or other and plays baseball. That's enough for me. I do not understand baseball and as a typical human reaction, I fear it. Fear leads to hate, hate leads to the dark side, etc etc... Besides, with the interest in baseball seemingly at an all time low (based on no real numbers but my personal opinion) I think the national pass-time should be changed from baseball to football. It is certainly far more exciting, IMHO.
20:04EST-TUE-7/16/2002
- After catching a glimpse of the Daily Show last night and their report on the new skull discovered in Chad possibly being the missing link between man and ape millions of years ago, I did a little dance of joy that there was yet another nail in the coffin for creationists. Today I did a bit more digging and came across this and was let down a bit. Just little a bit though. It'll be interesting to see how this one plays out. I think I'll go read some more about our plans to take over Mars now. That always puts a twinkle in my eye.
17:00EST-SAT-7/13/2002
- It appears that we're all looking for love so I'll throw in my own two cents. After all, that is all it's worth. Lust is like the False Prophet of love. It comes and goes, but it is a far cry from the genuine article. The good bit is that once lust is gone, the emotion that remains is the important one. I've only lucked into that emotion two or three times. I wish I could find it again.
15:31EST-FRI-7/12/2002
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| I was just reading through the literature that came with my NRA membership card and filling out the form for the free hat when Lucas started laughing hysterically. I asked him what he was so jubilant about and he read me a snippet from the latest Maxim magazine. Ladies wrote in to talk about various things they like about sex and one woman said that she really enjoys it when the balls slap against her during thrusts and it sends her right over the edge. It was obvious that neither he or I had put much thought into that aspect. So, I put the question to you. |
2:42EST-FRI-7/12/2002
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I love HK Pro. That is a great website but I think they owe us all an explanation for the origin of this photo. |
1:25EST-THU-7/11/2002
- I've noticed a disturbing trend in the blogs of the fellow Ridgemonkey Webring members. We all have our own unique writing styles so the words are different, but the meaning is still the same. 'I am lonely and want me some luvin'. The only exception to this seems to be Holly. Brava! Then again, she already has all the womens and refuses to share. We should organize a raid on her secret stash of womens and make her share. Maybe that'll cheer up the gang's spirits. I know what it's like. In fact, it reminds me of something my father once said (oh god, I'm about to quote my own friggin father!); There's a big different between being in love and being in love with being in love. I know what it means, but I'll warn you now. I just got home from a busy Gun Day so I smell like cider, cigarettes, pizza, and gunpowder. I love that smell! I'd ponder the financial possibilities of marketing a perfume like that, but that would be getting too far off topic and we know how good I am at that already. I ponder the words of my father and then I ponder the words of some TV sitcom where someone said that we have to be happy with ourselves before we can be happy with others. I think that's entirely too true and I suspect that whoever wrote that was either a genius or stole it from a book I haven't read yet. (Uh-oh... GI Joe just came on TV. I loved this show!) Anyway, I've been even more emotionally iron-clad than most guys as a result, but I'm pretty damned good at being happy by my own damned self. Heh heh heh, especially during Happy Time. (grin) That leads to greater self confidence and I hear women dig that sort of thing. Whether it's because women like a guy who can take charge or because they like a challenging spirit to break I can't be certain. Maybe it's just so they know they aren't getting mixed up with a basket case. Yeah, that's probably it. If women are so attracted to self confidence, I should have women beating down my door with the ego I have. Oh sure, I try to keep it in check with constant self-ridicule but that also serves two purposes. The first is the obvious of trying to not come off as being arrogant all the time, but mostly it's because I enjoy the chance to make people laugh and if we can't laugh at ourselves, we have no right to laugh at others. Now I just have to find out who it was that told Jessica that I had a large penis and put a stop to their horrible lies before they set a dangerously high precedent!
1:15EST-WED-7/10/2002
- With as much as I rant about guns, I may just have to create a sub-page for that like I have for my music. I'm pretty sure it will get more attention though. Especially since I was accepted today as a member of ORSA (see below) so I have a groovy place to go play with hardware. On a side note, I caught up with the pages of most of my friends again today. I keep meaning to check them more than once a week, but you know how it is. It's like going to the grocery store without a shopping list. I sit down in front of the computer and just sort of wander around trying to think of what I was meaning to do there.
Chuck, I know exactly what you're talking about. That's why I've converted to hedonism. Then once your demeanor changes, your dreams change with it. For example, you stop having those dreams about going to school naked once you start to enjoy them.
Jesse, if you ever decide to put that pic up as a what are they saying in this picture subject, my entry would have to be 'Now where did I leave my beer bottle???'
Nick, we will be certain to have a party waiting for you when you get back. Even if Chuck doesn't do any of the planning, I will. I promise there will be plenty of party... and blankets... and soap...
Another point of irony is that the last entry on the Eternal Donut's web page says we all suck for never updating but that was over a month ago and he still hasn't added anything new. I'm sure there's a lesson we can all learn from that but I hate shows with morals.
Is anyone having a party this Saturday night?
22:48EST-TUE-7/9/2002
- Fun with polls! The last one earned me several emails and since I love getting email so much I decided to try another one to continue with a conversation we had the other day (while drinking) and see what the sober world thinks. I tried to offer a wider variety of choices since a similar poll offered on another page earned a comment of 'Geeze, a girl's got shit options' from Holly.
23:11EST-SUN-7/7/2002
- French fries. They never quite have enough salt, do they? I don't know about you, but I always love me some salty fries. If anyone else has ever had to work in a job where they have to ask if the customer would like french fries with their order, then they will surely have heard someone ask for their fries without salt. Why? Are they afraid of their blood pressure or something? Hell no! They would do that because they knew that the fries were already salted and in order to have unsalted french fries, a new batch would have to be made just for them. Fresh fries. The corporations soon became wise to their tricks and forbid salt to be put anywhere near the fries. That way customers could ask for all the unsalted french fries they wanted but they still got the old nasty crap scraped from the bottom of the fryer. I laugh at their futility but this means that I don't get salt with my fries now and when I do, it's never enough. Sure, I could try putting on that little packet of salt they like giving you but have you ever tried that? What a mess.
Sheesh, that was a retarded tangent when I just wanted to talk about chips and salsa. Mmmmmm... Chiiiiiiipps... Ssssaaaallllaaaa... Lucas and Zak are trying to convince me that my fascination with chips and salsa is unhealthy. Actually, they said something like it being 'unholy' I think, but you know what they mean. It's not MY fault they're so darned tasty. I keep buying more and more chips and quest for the perfect salsa. Tonight I thought about buying enough to cover my bed so I could frolic on them. Then I thought that something that silly would make a neat photo. Then I thought about what the photo would look like (can we say American Beauty?) and almost swerved off the road. It would be a bad scene, I'm sure. Still...
14:42EST-SUN-7/7/2002
- Wow, I've been getting quite a bit of great feedback on the latest poll. Not so much in the way of votes, but in the emails I've been getting of people sharing very intimate details of their sex lives. People don't seem to like talking about 'private' subjects like that around their friends unless they are very close or very flirtatious. Luckily, my friends and I have no shame and like talking about subjects that are considered taboo on a daily basis. It sure makes for amusing conversation. I mean, come on, which conversation would you rather have?
Them: 'Nice weather we're having today.'
You: 'Oh, uh, yeah. I guess so.'
Them: 'Not a cloud in the sky! It sure looks like a hot one today!'
You: 'Hot. Right. Damned evil day star.'
Them: 'Shame we have to work for a living, eh? It would be a great day to be on the beach!'
You: 'Do I know you?'
-or-
Them: 'I remember when people used to think that having a tongue ring was such a big deal for oral sex, but more and more I'm finding that good head is good head with or without jewelry. Besides, the penis is not sensitive enough to tell if they've got a spike through their tongue or not.'
You: 'Heh, yeah. Nothing is worse than bad head. At least it gives us a chance to learn from the mistakes of others.'
Them: 'Teeth?'
You: 'Teeth.'
16:42EST-SAT-7/6/2002
- Whew! Well that was a really good party. I handed the camera to Holly to take all the pics she liked and this is what she came up with. It's amazing what you can catch with a camera. It's a telepathic camera, yeah, that's it... Ok, fine. I fucked with the pics a bit to make them more web friendly and add bits where I just couldn't resist. I hope you enjoy them. If it says that I've exceeded my bandwidth limitation, try again after midnight GMT when the counters reset.
16:22EST-FRI-7/5/2002
- My hangover from yesterdays bacchanalia forbids me from forming rational thought patterns in hopes to find sane reason for why Jesse was searching for 'jack frost fucking care bears'.
13:49EST-FRI-7/5/2002
- I was talking to a few friends yesterday and the subject of sex came up. Imagine that! Specifically, we were discussing looking at your partner during sex. The answers and reasons were fairly varied but we didn't have a woman's perspective at the time. Not exactly the easiest thing to work smoothly into a conversation. It would probably be something like this; 'Oh cool, I love this song! Say, while we are on the subject, when you are having sex with a guy do you like to look at him or just close your eyes?' Why do women almost always close their eyes and the guys almost always don't? I understand that most women do not think of themselves as being attractive and that is why they do not like having lights on during sex unless they like watching in a mirror placed by the bed so they can watch themselves having sex. It seems common enough to me, but I go to great lengths not to date women who are shy or dainty. As for looking at your partner during sex, I must admit that I rather enjoy looking at my partner. I watch for tale tale signs that I'm doing something well or poorly so I can adjust accordingly. However, when my partner looks at me it is like kryptonite. I can't read their expression and the question of why they are looking at me screams for answers in the back of my mind. What are they looking for? Expecting me to make some sort of wacky faces while she's not looking? If that's the case then they're out of luck since I'm so stoic during sex. Another reason perhaps... One guy said that he likes it when the women look at him since he knows they are not thinking of anyone else. I suppose I'll never know unless I ask but that's not an option until I find another woman who likes looking. So, I put the question to you. Do you like it when your partner looks?
18:34EST-MON-7/1/2002
- My roomies are forcing me to watch Spongebob Squarepants. Oh, the humanity! Oh, the pain! The suffering! Actually, it's kind of amusing. Ok, now that THAT is out of the way, I had a good day of gun bit aquisition. The adjustable trigger and recoil reduction bar came in today. After a few minutes of dropping parts and not being able to find them again, I got everything installed and put the living room back in normal order. I have -got- to find a better place to work on my guns where I'm not in frequent danger of losing parts over and over again. Last time I worked on the 10/22, I had to move everything in my room out into the hallway, including the bed before I found the missing part in my sock drawer. Anyway, that's just the tip of the iceburg. If you read a post down, I found a really groovy Remington 700 upper assembly. Well, today I went out and got it. I had to remind Tobias that he had offered it. He seemed sad. He seemed every bit as attached to it as I am with all of my stuff too. By the time all the paperwork was finished, he seemed on the verge of tears. I chose not to do my happy dance until I was out of sight. Oh, while chatting with them I discovered that the stocks I was interested in getting from them are significantly cheaper now. That will save me a couple hundred dollars that I will probably end up spending on other accessories for it. By this time next month, I should have the stock for it installed and tuned. Now all I have to do is come up with a good scope to put on top of it. That's harder than it sounds for my task. Gah! Maybe I should just bite the bullet (heh, now appropirate) and cough up the money for a Swarovski. GAH! Dammit, Spongebob is back on again. No matter how hard I try, I can't concentrate on guns while this is on.
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