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September '03

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Quotes of the Years Remembrances Other quotethings Other people's quotebooks Other things entirely The Fiendy Bunch

I was raised by a cup of coffee

 Quote of the Month
"He had me at Hillel." -- Dana, 9/6

9/4
Starbucks in Farmingdale
"Heavens to nippatroid." -- Hoter

9/5
Crapple's
Kathleen: I kinda want the nachos, but I don't want to eat them all.
Hoter: I'll get the nachos.
Kathleen: You will? Will you share them with me? I love youuuu!
...about 20 seconds later...
Kathleen: Why do we get them?
Hoter: I don't know, I really hate them.
Kathleen: Let's not get them then!

Andrew: Are you pointing at the nachos again? Put it out of your mind.
Hoter: But we HATE them!
Kathleen: No we don't, we LOVE them!

"Imagine if Hoter was in a snowglobe? She'd be like 'TOUCH THE GLASS!'" -- Kathleen, referencing quotes from my book and her book!

my house
"What does this remind me of? OH! Indian people!" -- Kathleen, I believe making a reference between drinking and Nisit.

ralph

"You are the least politically correct person in this room right now." -- Andrew, to Kathleen
"My goal is to kill you both." -- Kathleen, during a card game, as if the goal is ever anything different.

9/6
online
"He had me at Hillel." -- Dana

9/7
online
"Uh oh. I've reached the point in a conversation with a new guy when I must tell him that I don't like cheese. It's like coming out of the cheese closet." -- Andrew

9/8
Diner? Crap? Somewhere.
Ben: I'll juje you.
Andrew: I'd like to see you try.

9/9
Sunken Meadow Beach (L'seagul 4t)
"You should go up to people in Brookstone and be like, 'I'm a chair!'" -- Kathleen, on my (limited) Shiatsu massage ability
"I've got ovaries in here!" -- Kathleen, reacting to Shiatsu.
"L'seagul from L'hel!" -- Kathleen, discovering that sometimes Bglowslieth sounds like French.
"Why me? I didn't shit on the bird! I will, if I get the chance." -- Kathleen, after being shat on by L'seagul from L'hel.

9/10
online
"Flakes and Crackers. Your school sounds very carbohydratey." -- Mary

9/12
Outside the Dojo
"If it makes you feel any better, I haven't slept in ten years." -- Laura

The Hoterrarium (Whoopi's first appearance in The Quotebook!)
Andrew: Is that Rosie O'Donnell?
Heather G: No.
Andrew: Is that Lucy Liu?
Heather G: No.
Hoter: Good thing Heather's here.

Andrew: Tall, dark and ugly.
Heather G: Sounds like my date from last night.

Note: Heather G shall henceforth be referred to as "Whoopi."

Momma Hote: Hi Ben.
Hotermom: Ben's not here.

Momma Hote: Do you prefer Jen or Jennifer?
Hotermom: There is no Jennifer in this room!

9/13
In the City with Bryanna
"Chivalry isn't dead. It's just been sleeping ... with other men." -- Bryanna

9/18
Crapadopolis
Kathleen: What is THAT?
Hoter: A long-sleeved gray shirt.

9/19
Taormina
"You are the biggest freak of nature! The biggest!" -- Hoter, I believe about the fact that I don't like cucumbers.

9/20
online
"What does she call you? Testicle?" -- Courtney, on the origin of Hoter's name.

9/24
Canasta: Irish vs. Jewish
"Luck of the Jewish. Erin go Baruch ata Ad-nai." -- Andrew
"DIRTY! Hahahahahah." -- Matt, laughing at the Irish's inability to get a clean.

9/26
online
"dude... I'm a Jewish holiday waiting to happen! If I were dating a Jew, all he'd need was the honey!" -- Miss Apple

9/28
Borders: overnight
"My feeling is that if you're gonna eat the meat, you might as well eat the hooves." -- Mimi
"So I said to my husband, 'Ya know, if you want to fool around, go ahead. You don't HAVE to kill me. I don't care about the money. I'd rather live." -- Mimi, about Rabbi Nussbaum.

9/30
Borders
Alice: I have to go home and put a chicken in the oven for my family so they have something to eat later.
Mimi: Aw, how sweet. Poor chicken.

The Diner
"It's like the juice of the old people." -- Kathleen, about white zinfandel.
"We love you! We hate you! You're the nachos!" -- Kathleen

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